Oh good luck with Esther's transfusion if she has it (sounds like a good idea). So sorry about the worry of the infection on the ward - what a nightmare. Keeping my fingers crossed that it doesn't spread. I know all the neonatal nurses drum good handwashing technique into the parents.
Luckily Alex didn't have to stay more than a few hours in the NICU - he was on the high dependency ward for a couple of days and then what I called the "fattening up room" for a week and a half.
We were at St Helier in Sutton (having been transferred out from King's in utero).
He's totally fine now apart from mild anaemia - he caught up from the 9th to the 50th centile really fast but as they said on another thread - any routine that the hospital imposes goes when you get home because they wake up more often and want to feed A LOT.
My friend in the states had twin boys at 30 weeks and they are doing so well now, you'd never know they were premature.
I can't imagine how tough it is for you and your husband - I felt like I was cracking up and my situation was a lot less extreme than yours. I rememer alternating between being so happy and proud that I had such a beautiful little baby and then being in teaful hysterics really worried that something would happen to him - and the separation was horrible. I'd stare at photos of him constantly when I couldn't be on the ward. Oh, and guilt that I couldn't carry/grow him properly - it turned out when I had the caesarian that I have a bicornuate uterus which caused the problems.
It made me more anxious about his health after we got home and of other people holding him until he was about 4 months. It's not an issue now.
You are allowed to grieve for not having had the birth/early days that you'd expected - any feelings are what they are. There's no right or wrong way to feel.
It's funny how alien the SCBU is at first but how quickly you become habituated to it.