Struggling mentally/emotionally after traumatic premature birth

[missjulie]

Have just joined mumsnet, not sure what i am doing yet!
Am a first time mum, my daughter is 18 weeks old.
She was 7 weeks premature, and in S.C.B.U for a month.
Looking for other mums to chat to about my/our birth experiences, scbu etc....events have finally caught up with me, and i am struggling emotionally/mentally with the traumatic events of premature birth etc....
Am experiencing extremely vivid flashbacks & having nightmares....
Wondered if anyone else in the Inverness area is going through the same thing, and fancies chatting about it?
Willing to meet up in person.
Am feeling very lonely with regards to this.....

I don't know if you've had much help since your original post, I hope you have but I went to my gp who referred me to a counsellor. I eventually stopped having nightmares after seeing her for a while.

I have had about 6 sessions or so with a counsellor. It is definately helping. The flashbacks and nightmares are not so frequent, aslthough still debilitating.
I have good days and bad days, and just have to take things one day at a time.
It took me so much fighting with people in the medical professions before i eventually got help. So frustrating that i had to fight sohard for it.
That's fantastic that your nightmares have stopped! So pleased for you! J x

My daughter is 4 and at school. It does get easier

Hi i Just wanted to say to you that it does get easier. Stick with the counselling, it really does help & it may be that in the future you go back for more as your feelings change.

My ds2 is 8 now and I can even look back on those first months & smile now as they were his first days & weeks, no matter how traumatic.
We go to the hospital every couple of months (ds2 has some long term disabilities) and have even called in to the scbu without bursting in to tears.

jjkm, i hope your dd's are home with you soon.

jjkm. i hope your ds are with you soon. I am only 9 months in with Ds and while we still have our moments I agree it does get easier, and you'll see from some of my earlier posts that I really doubted that it ever would. I have gone back into scbu and NICU and the staff are all amazed by DS and how big he now is, and I can't really imagine he was the size of the babies in the incubators only earlier this year.

Miss julie glad you are getting some help, keep at it.

and to everyone who is reasing this, especially those whose LOs are still in hospital at this time of year, you are in my thoughts

My word! You poor poor love! You really have been through the mill!
It is wonderful that you have your faith to see you through.
I wish you lots of love, and hope that everything works out for all of you.
Take care, and keep in touch,
Julie x

Haven't read all the thread but reading your first post, about flashbacks and nightmares, it sounds like symptoms of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (which I suffer from, though the trauma wasn't a birth)
For a start your mental health team SHOULD be helping you as it IS mental illness, regardless of what incident caused it. Please insist on help. Your GP can refer you for counselling.
A group called Anxiety UK (google them) have a very useful website about Post Traumatic Stress and offer very cheap telephone counselling or face to face counselling if they have a therapist near you. Please join them and ask to be referred to a counsellor. They get someone to call you back quickly and at least they can help you talk over the trauma.
Phone Samaritans whenever you feel like sobbing and talking even though you may not have found another mum to talk to at least it'll get it off your chest every time you feel low.
Hassle your GP for counselling and mention PTSD.