Pregnancy 💔

[Girlwithdreams]

Hi girls hope your all well,

so I thought I would just have a little conversation with you like I have no friends or no one to talk to. I thought I’d just write something on here. Try and get my point across without breaking down and crying. This has give me a few attempts to write this, but I’m ready to write it now. I am currently four weeks and six days pregnant I am due the 21st of November 2026 I’m not baby’s dad baby. Dad broke up with me a few months ago. I just would like your advice on the background history and what I should do from here and how to mentally deal with this because I’m in a situation where I have no clue what to do, or where I haven’t got no family or anyone to

So I’m at my ex back in June 2024 This was the best relationship I actually thought I’d Yeah be in We was perfect. We was fine, we was happy everything was amazing so I was living in a woman’s refuge due to domestic violence Yeah, and obviously he lived in a while from me About an hour away from each other, so he came to see me and it went from there. I did get housed properly and then I found out I was pregnant two months after being together moved into a complete new house really nice he moved in anyway the Pregnancy. I had a termination due to the fact that he kept going out every weekend. Going to his dad’s coming back leaving coming back messing me around so I thought I can’t do this. The sickness was absolutely terrible. I was under so much pressure I couldn’t deal with it. I wasn’t mentally stable to have a baby with him. Anyway that’s sadly ended and then afterwards Things starts to get a little bit strange with money situations. He would be a bit controlling with money so I’d lend him money all the time and he give me the smallest bit back and make excuses all the time used to always slag his family off to me 24 seven, say they don’t need nothing to do with them, then none of your business and nothing to do with it and obviously I have a diagnosis of BPD so I used to get a bit clingy I won’t lie and say I used to get very clingy and he’s all I had and have no family no one he’s literally all I have anyway after that face he started sorting himself out like being with me a bit more often being nicer and making me feel really happy so I was calm. I was absolutely cool. I told him one night go out you deserve it. Enjoy yourself for your friends go and do it like I think you deserve it you’ve been absolutely amazing go out I’ll just chill home I love a nice bath anyway didn’t see him for five days and money was gone. My bank account was gone everything he use my card to buy beers he was doing drugs on the slides. I found cocaine in the house and he said that it was his mates, but it will see was in his bag so clearly not. It was just a constant back-and-forth battle all the time it was back-and-forth battle constantly all the time you could imagine it was miserable, miserable relationship, but I loved him and I still do. I loved it because when we was good, we was good. He made me feel so special buying nice things talk to me so nice and just help me in Waze that no one ever help me like when I’m sad and low head help me always I’ve never been treated before and it was amazing it was absolutely amazing when we was good. We was absolutely fantastic. I couldn’t ask for better relationship but then he used to go cold me and then I’d switch because I think why being horrible and then make out that I’m the one crazy all the time I am currently pregnant now we broke up about two months ago, we met on the 27th of February and I found out I was pregnant week ago. He pulled out and has blamed me for it saying that I dropped him when actually this is where the store gets even better so when we broke up, he went to his brothers house and obviously his brother has his own place and he’s running off of his brother soon as he left that was it don’t wanna know me don’t want nothing to do with me, told all his family I was abusing him told his family that I use them rape told his family absolutely everything under the Sun, but I have no idea about because I have no idea who was in a bad place, he just said he was staying there for awhile, but personally I thought that was to get a place that was a place to live. That’s why I personally feel like it was it was playing with my head playing with my head telling his family weren’t talking to me because he went there start crying and he was saying I’m never going back to her again never going back to her. Anyway he’s told his family that I’m going to a hotel to meet some secret little tart if I don’t reply, my phone is going to be off and he was playing with me telling me how good friends how much he loves being friends with me now and how great our relationship is to the point it was messing me about kept give me false promises was support. I had enough and I told his family that was going on and they said we didn’t even know it was talking to you. We didn’t even know we didn’t know nothing and then I’ve told them stuff that he said opened the can of worms and he absolutely got caught out red-handed absolutely red-handed saying it’s all my fault I was going to get kicked out the house because of you I’m going to get kicked out constantly constantly I’m gonna get kicked out because they friend kick him out over it for all of the shit he was talking and it was my fault still so now I’m currently pregnant and I’m panicking because I’m in a hostel I don’t know what I’m gonna do because I’m not gonna lie I don’t wanna get rid of this baby I really don’t but he doesn’t want it. He told me doesn’t want. Nothing. Serve me don’t nothing to do with the baby so contact him in nine months, not at all I don’t know if he’s told his family said they know but I don’t know and I’m literally here on my own in this baby and his support but I’m getting done and he’s text me saying I’ll call you later to talk about all when I know she’s gonna be another argument he says I’m not mentally stable for a baby, I’m too schizophrenic come crazy don’t nothing to do with it when I am stable, I’m in good medication. I’m fine. I’m okay but I feel fine. I just feel mentally drained from the situation. I just want a better support. I’m not asking him to be my best friend. I’m not asking him to even like me. I’m just asking for a bit of support he doesn’t even have to be there he can get on his life and do what he wants. It’s my life it’s gonna change but I just don’t know what I can actually save him for him to realise that I’m not here to be the bad girl I’m not here to be the bad guy at all or the bad girl. However you put it I’m not here for that. I’m here for support and to bring this baby up because every time I keep looking at them tests, the lines, getting darker and darker and it’s just so nice it’s so nice I have an abortion Scan booked for Friday 27th because he said that he wanted me to have a termination so I’ve booked it but I just can’t go through it and I don’t feel like I could even see a baby on the scan at six weeks and go ahead of it I’m just in such a lost place at the minute. Have a no one around me but I really don’t want to lose this baby and I really do not want to have an abortion because someone please give me some general advice and what to do, and how to go about this please x

Oh hun, I’m sorry for all that you are going through. Do you have any family or friends that you can lean on for support? Someone you can confide in and talk to in real life? It is a really tough situation but I will tell you from my personal experience. I had an abortion 3 months ago that I deeply regret and the emptional pain since has been the worst I have ever felt in my life. I don’t think it will ever leave me, I’ll just have to learn to live with that decision and regret the rest of my life and in my personal opinion it is so not worth it. I wish that I kept my baby more than anything. It is a big decision and sounds like in your case you would be a single parent, which comes with its own challenges. Do you have any other children? Since you are already having a hard time at the thought of aborting, please just take the time to really process and think about this and how it may affect you after if you do decide to go through with it.