Impossible decision about abortion

[needhelpandallusernamesaretaken]

I feel like I’m trying to make an impossible decision. I have recently found out I’m about 8 weeks pregnant. I missed a couple of pills between Christmas and New Year so I went and got plan b from the pharmacy, obviously it didn’t work.

We already have a son but since he was born my husband has always said he didn’t want a second child. About two years ago the same thing happened with my pill (didn’t take plan b) and he pressured me to get an abortion which I have regretted ever since. He has admitted he wasn’t very nice last time and has said he will not put pressure on me again but listed his (valid) reasons for not wanting another. But after already having an abortion I know how much it affected me, I think borderline depression. I love him completely and we’ve been together nearly 20 years. I don’t think I can go through another abortion. But either way in this scenario one of us ends up unhappy.

Such a horrible situation. I think you should do what you want and not what your husband wants. He should and could have got the snip after the last situation rather than letting it possibly happen again. It’s not fair on you. Your body your choice.

I too think that of your DH was so adamant he should not be leaving the contraception to you.

How are you feeling now?

I honestly don’t know. My mind changes every five minutes from there’s no way I can go through another abortion to it’s the more logical and probably easier choice to go through with it. I have cried almost constantly for days.

Please sit down and talk to him, let him know your feelings and thoughts because they are as important as his “valid” reasons. See where he stands. You matter and your womb and children matter too, it’s not all about him. Ask for his support and if he does not provide it, please consider that man is only looking out for himself and no others. If he has reasons for not wanting more children, abortion is not a contraception method either. If you felt depression after the first abortion it may be even heavier this time around, as in your giving up so much of yourself and your body for your husbands comfort. Think about yourself too and your mental health as well, you matter in all of this as well. Your existing child needs to see his mom happy no matter the circumstances.