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Pregnancy choices

This topic is for sharing experiences of pregnancy choices; to debate the ethics of termination, visit our Politics or Chat forums.

Trigger warning* decided to proceed with a termination, what do I do about work?

1 reply

Soconfused7 · 04/01/2026 15:44

I've recently discovered I'm pregnant due to contraception failing. I'm absolutely distraught as we've been so careful as I had a termination 5 years ago and I was so badly affected by it I never wanted to be in this position again. At times I was suicidal and I was in a very very dark place. I don't know if it was the hormones, anxiety, a reaction to the tablets but it changed my life. I wasn't working at the time so I muddled through and it took over 6 months to recover. I have 2 disabled children and it wasn't an easy decision but the right one.

I have an phonecall appointment with BPAS on Tuesday and Wednesday. I don't know what to tell my boss when I have the procedure and how it's going to affect me. I work for the NHS and there's a degree of protection around pregnancy but my boss doesn't have children, I don't think she can, I don't even know if she wants to but I want to tread carefully. I don't know whether to say a pregnancy related procedure and if I need more time off stating pregnancy related loss but it feels as though I'm lying. I don't know what to do. Please be kind as I feel bad enough.

OP posts:
BeRedBiscuit · 04/01/2026 18:35

Hi, so sorry you're in this situation. Please know it's perfectly acceptable, and I'd recommend, to simply advise you've experienced pregnancy loss....you absolutely do not need to reveal it's due to a termination, the same way someone else wouldn't need to say about a miscarriage. A loss is a loss and covers both without unnecessary detail for others. It's your buisness only. That's personally what I'd do anyway.

Be kind to yourself and take care.

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