To terminate at 12 weeks - seizures

[raaraaooh]

I developed epilepsy in a previous pregnancy. Only had 1 grande mal seizure during and then a few awareness seizures after the baby was born. Haven’t had any seizures in 4 years.

I’m now 12 weeks pregnant and I’ve already had a couple of awareness seizures early on and now 6 in the last 5 days. Medication has been upped a few times. V hard to get hold of neurologist. It takes about a month for me to receive any correspondence from him via post. The support has been appalling.

I’m really starting to think I’ve made a huge mistake getting pregnant. I have a 12 week scan on Monday, although I think I’m around 13 weeks. I’m absolutely dreading everything. The seizures are obviously only going to get worse throughout pregnancy & perhaps even turn into full blown seizures. I now can’t drive and have 2 kids to get to school and back (I do have the help of others to do this, but it’s nice to be independent).

I don’t know if I would be making a huge mistake terminating. 12 weeks also seems so far along, but I don’t know how I’m meant to cope like this. I’m constantly waiting for another seizure and I’m exhausted from all of them.

My work has really gone downhill. I can’t concentrate after having seizures. I do everything wrong and the emails etc don’t make sense to me. I mess up all sorts of little things. My Manager knows all of this and just says ‘let me know if you’re struggling’ and then gives me extra jobs. Like what do you mean ‘if I’m struggling?!’ I’m on deaths fucking door here.

just needed a rant. Anyone been in a similar position, and did you end up having a termination? I wouldn’t have gotten pregnant if I’d know it would be like this.

Recently had abortion at that stage and worst decision ever it’s made me suicidal. I pray you continue your pregnancy and get medical help

I think you need close medical monitoring, medication and probably being off work as much as possible, rather than a termination, if I'm honest.

I don't injure the best way to expedite things with the neurologist, but that's what needs to happen. Have you spoken to your midwife about this, and your fears about continuing.

Work is irrelevant, this is about the future and long term shape of your family, and if that means going on sick leave until this is resolved (if necessary for the rest of pregnancy) so be it. You attracted going to be driving for 6-12 months even if you terminated today, and again, that's all temporary.

I'm not dismissing how scary this is for you - it's vital that it's got under control. But it would be incredible sad if lack of medical care pushed you into aborting.

I thought @Babyboomtastic had very good perspective. Just wanted to say, don't be ashamed to accept help from others, or hesitant to ask for it. I remember back when my daughter was little, I met a nice mum (divorced from a bad husband) with a few young sons at the playground and we had a nice conversation, exchanged cell numbers. Less than two weeks later she called me, saying she didn't know anyone else who was not working, that she had a horrible flu and could I come babysit her boys while she slept. I remember sitting in her house, taking care of her children, and feeling so glad that she reached out to me. Twenty years later we're still good friends but at the time, she barely knew me.

I hope you'll be able to get medical leave from work and lean on kind friends, family, and neighbors during this difficult time. Hoping you can get through the pregnancy and that your seizures will go away. So sorry to hear how hard it is to get through to the doctor. Does there tend to be a "worst time" to have these kind of seizures during pregnancy, or is it different for every person?

@Anxious24I hope you are starting to feel a little bit better now ❤️.

@BabyboomtasticThanks so much for this. This is the advice that I didn’t know I needed. I felt so much better after reading this.

I had a scan and appointment with the midwife etc today. The head of something (can’t remember her title) was furious that I was having such poor communication with neurology. She rang up there and then and gave them a bit of a mouthful 🙈. She is trying to get me an appointment with them soon. My current appointment with them is in July, but obviously that’s so far away and I could end up increasing my medication significantly without having proper advice by then.

Thank you for mentioning work. I have such guilt about taking time off, but actually there is a need for it. I work in civil service and fortunately could get the full 6 months off should I need it. I’ve told them I’m taking this week off & then I’ll see if seizures are any better.

The scan today showed that i’m further along than I thought, so I won’t be going through with a termination.

Your post honestly made me feel so much more positive, thank you.

@SilverScalesThank you! You’re so right about not needing to be shamed to ask for help.

I’m not sure if there’s a worst time for seizures during pregnancy . Every time I google it, it seems to say different things. I’m hoping that perhaps levels of blood in the system increase quickest in the first trimester, and then increase at a slower rate until the end of pregnancy, but that is literally just me hoping with zero evidence!! Hopefully I will get a call from the Neurologist soon and can find out.

thanks so much

@raaraaooh Thank you for your kind reply, I saw in your previous post that you are going to use your time off and I'm so glad you're getting what you need. Also happy to hear someone is on your side at the neurologist, and I hope you can get in soon. You sound strong, brave, and resourceful, and I hope that things are manageable in the weeks and months ahead (and congratulations!).