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Pregnancy choices

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Best process for abortion

4 replies

Twelve8Ts · 18/05/2025 09:19

Hi,

I’ve just found out I’m pregnant with my 4th baby (4 weeks) I had my youngest last year and unfortunately going ahead with this pregnancy would not be the right decision for us. And I sincerely apologise if that upsets anyone.

Could anyone give me any advice on the best route to take please? The local hospital has an Early Pregnancy Unit which they said I can make an appointment at, and I also have a call booked with Marie Stopes. But what’s the difference between the two, if any? Which is the better option?

thanks

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MyUmberSeal · 18/05/2025 09:36

I went through Marie Stopes last year, absolutely brilliant. You will have your initial phone appointment, takes about 15 minutes they will ask lots of questions, medical history, reason for wanting abortion (they have to ask that legally, doesn’t have to be a profound answer or sob story given, I just said I didn’t want a baby), they will ask when your last period was, whether you have been scanned, and what your preferred method of termination is, medical or surgical. If you are pretty certain of when your period was, they will work out how many weeks pregnant you are. If less then around 10 weeks, both options will be available to you, if over 10 weeks, they will most likely ask you to come to a clinic and be scanned.

I chose the medical option, I was 8 weeks and opted for tele-medicine, so had another appointment on the phone 2 days later, that’s the one whether they go through the actual procedure, when to take the pills, what to expect with bleeding etc. The pills arrived 2 days later. Followed the instructions and got it done.

The surgical option would require you to go to a clinic as an outpatient, depending on your gestation, they will remove the pregnancy under general anaesthetic or a local anaesthetic if you aren’t yet very far along. Marie Stopes have clinics all over but the surgical option isn’t always an option every day of the week as clinics sometimes only run the surgical option certain days of the week. In that sense, it might take longer, whereas the pills are sent straight away (unless you choose to take the medical route, but would rather do it at a clinic rather then home).

I wasn’t aware that EPU would do anything to help with the termination process, I guess they might scan you and refer you elsewhere, but it didn’t cross my mind to contact them, as I didn’t want the pregnancy or termination on my medical history. Marie Stopes is confidential and I opted to not have my GP told.

The actual termination was fine, a little painful but I was expecting that and Marie Stopes sends codeine out with the packet which you can take for pain relief. Hope all that helps.

I should add, that I’ve been very factual with above, but I was never in any doubt about my choice so had no emotional turmoil. That’s not the case for everyone. But all the abortion providers will tell you about counselling options should you want to discuss your options before deciding for sure.

Good luck. Any other questions, please ask. x

Twelve8Ts · 18/05/2025 12:49

@MyUmberSeal Thank you so much for taking the time to reply. I really appreciate it.

it sounds like going to the EPU could just be adding another unnecessary step to the process. I’ll stick with my Marie Stopes appointment.

thanks again x

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SilverScales · 22/05/2025 18:31

I wish you the best whatever path you take, Twelve8Ts. You're so early on, you might want to give yourself a little time to make sure you are making the choice that is best for you. I only say this because there have been so many women on this board who aborted quickly out of fear and worry, but later started thinking they might have liked to add one more to their family. It's rarely an easy choice, and always complicated. Hope things go well for you.

Twelve8Ts · 22/05/2025 21:59

@SilverScales Thanks for your message. I appreciate it. I am definitely making the right decision. I had 3 babies in 3.5 years and if I have this one I will have 4 under 5, which is personally too much for me to handle. I want to enjoy the children I have.
i don’t however agree with abortion as a method of contraception so will definitely make better choices from now on and would encourage everyone to do the same x

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