44 and I'm pregnant

[V1280]

Hi all,

I really need some advice. This is the first time posting anything like this online. On new years eve I found I am pregnant. I already have 2 children and I am in a happy relationship. It's my age that's a barrier (and space In the house) I contacted bpas straight away when I found out to get abortion pills, that was nearly a month ago. I can't physically bring myself to end this pregnancy and I am absolutely distraught. Time is massively running out for me and I don't know what to do. Please be kind because I know I have been stupid and I should have known better. My partner and I only had sex once and this happened. I'm in an absolute mess and I just don't know what to do. I don't have any family support other than my partner to talk to. My head is all over the place 🥹

Didn't want to read and run. I'm 39 and found out 3 weeks ago I was pregnant . A terrible mistake due to coming off the Pill to sort hormones out - thinking I was menopausal.

I've got a daughter of 8 and knew I'm not in the position to have anymore and both said we didn't want anymore children (both our children from previous partner) It didn't make my decision less traumatic or less guilt. You don't sound as sure though given you still have the pills? ❤️ x

Jen, thank you for replying. Did you have the abortion? I'm just so torn. We honestly thought our time was done and the first thing I said to my partner when we found out was "you know I can't do it this" yet here I am, nearly a month on. I've been In tears ever day and I just can't bring myself to end it. I have a 7 year old and 8 year old. They're just amazing and not hard work at all. BUT times are tough and I really struggle withy mental health. I am completely distraught and I have no idea what to do. I don't want to make the biggest mistake of my life, but I also don't want to ruin what we have. X

I had it today. It's been the scariest and most difficult few weeks. The guilt is terrible but for me I knew it was the right decision.

I feel for you because you do seem completely torn as to what to do. It's alot easier when you know and don't doubt it. How is your partner about it all? How many weeks are you if you don't mind me asking? X

Oh Jen, sending you a massive hug ❤️!! I am nearly 9 weeks. My partner wants to keep it. I have one foot in the door, and one foot out. There is just too many "ifs" and "buts" it's horrible and I am truly broken. How are you holding up. X

I had a termination when I was 41 and it pulled my life to pieces.
It was the most unplanned pregnancy ever and from the second I found out I went into instant fight or flight.
Nothing prepared me for the feeling of guilt and loss after.
The only thing I can tell you is that if you aren’t 100% sure don’t do it because you can’t change your mind after.
I wish I’d found this site before I did it because reading some of the ladies stories like mine may have prevented me making what was the biggest mistake of my life.
Good luck with whatever you decide.

I agree with Noideawhy. I cant imagine being torn and really feel for you. Good luck whatever you decide ❤️