I'm childless by choice and this Chrismas made me realize

[31andconfused]

Hi

I'm childless by choice I'm in my 30s but this Christmas made me feel like I have something missing. Seeing all videos and photos of children and families enjoying the festivities made me feel so sad.

But I know deep down I shouldn't have kids, I wouldn't be a good mother , I'm too selfish and I prefer my own time and space.

More to the point I just don't feel old enough either I feel like I need more years haha but in reality time is ticking for me..

Last February I got pregnant then had an abortion , it was planned to but I was so depressed at the thought of being a parent and reality had hit me and that's when i decided it's not for me.

I dunno the reason of this post, I just needed to share my feelings.

Hiya

It could be worth exploring what that missing piece is for you and whether that is a child.

Everyone says you can’t ever really be ready to have a child but you do adapt your lifestyle so it may not be worth worrying too much about how you currently live. Also having dealt with quiet dysfunctional parents my whole life, for some reason you always love them even with their faults.

I am also childless and in my late 30s but not by choice but more due to mental health issues which I am trying to work through. I am considering freezing my eggs to give me options for the future if things were to improve.

Why do yoi think you'll be a bad mum. Perhaps explorecthat through therapy and you might change your mind.