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Pregnancy choices

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Medical Abortion - My Experience.

13 replies

DanBo32 · 13/10/2024 09:59

Hi,
Hoping this helps someone. I scrolled and scrolled these pages, read a couple of positive stories but with having severe health anxiety I thought I'd share my experience so far.

I found out I was pregnant at the end of sept.
We already have 3 kids. From 12yrs - 18months. I knew I couldn't cope with a 4th. Mentally. Spoke to my husband and we both agreed that a termination was the right choice for us. Even though I've been really against them, but you just never know, until you're in that situation.

I signed up with BPAS the thursday evening, spoke to a lovely midwife the following day who was none judgemental. She asked about my medical history. Date of my last period etc. Turned out I was about 5 weeks 3 days at this point. Opted to proceed without a scan, I'm usually like clockwork when it comes to my periods. So missing that period, I just knew. I just confirmed it with a test. I got my pills the day after but was at work.

With me now having some time off work for a few days, this was now the perfect time for me. I took the first one this Friday night (now approx 6 weeks 3 days) just gone. All seemed okay. Woke up around 7am, with pains and bleeding. Like a very light period. Wore a pad just incase, however was just there when I wiped. I called BPAS in a panic, wondering if it was normal cause the threads I'd read, noone seemed to have experienced that. But the lady on the phone reassured me that it is.

Saturday night (last night) we got the youngest settled. I took x2 paracetamol around half 6. Got my hot water bottle ready, headed up to our bedroom. Used the toilet, washed my hands etc. Got myself comfortable on the bed and inserted the x4 tablets at 7.30pm. I knew in my head that if nothing was happening I'd need to insert the next 2 at 11.30pm. I got watching tv, taking my mind of things.
Around 9.30pm I started with what I can only describe as mild contractions. Bearable, however the water bottle and paracetamol definitely helped. I fell asleep (unaware what time) But was definitely before half 11, so i didn't take the additional 2, i woke up at 4am. Went to the bathroom worried that I'd fallen asleep and things may not have got going and thinking am I too late to now take them? anyway I sat on the toilet and passed a clot the size of a golf ball. Which i presume was the pregnancy. This didn't hurt at all. After that I've been experiencing some cramps and bleeding heavier. Like a heavy period. I feel very 'worn out'.

Before taking these tablets I was definitely starting to feel pregnant. But my tummy has reduced significantly, my breast no longer hurt. I feel okay.

I'm still in the mist of things, so will update here how I go on. It was much better than I anticipated. So far. I'd definitely say be prepared, cause everyone is different. Try not to focus on the horror stories, there's far more positive ones out there.

OP posts:
DanBo32 · 14/10/2024 06:39

Just an update!

The bleeding has been on & off heavy. I've lost a few very small clots.
Still had a few cramps and started with a headache. Definitely recommend keeping on top of painkillers.

This morning. I just feel tired, very tired. But sleeping very well. In fact I've not slept very well for a few weeks. But I'm definitely sleeping better. Mentally I'm okay. I was abit sad last night going to bed. But I know my hormones are going to be raging.

I know, this is such a hard decision to make, and it certainly isn't an easy process to go through. But sometimes we find ourselves here, for some reason or another. Although I was against them, I do understand why people opt for this now. After being there myself.

Any ladies going through or potentially going through, I hope everything goes well, try not to read too much. Remember the reasons why you chose this in the first place and it'll all be over before you know it.

You're welcome to message me if you need a hand to hold. ❤️

OP posts:
RosesAndHellebores · 14/10/2024 06:45

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Soontobe60 · 14/10/2024 06:54

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What a disgusting post!

Soontobe60 · 14/10/2024 06:56

I hope you’re ok OP. Terminating a pregnancy is never a simple decision, but ultimately it’s vital that a woman has the right to choose. I wish you well.

Devilsmommy · 14/10/2024 06:56

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Are you fucking joking, what a fucked up post

RosesAndHellebores · 14/10/2024 06:59

Disgusting? Why? This could all have been avoided if the man had taken more responsibility if another pregnancy was out of the question. I am sorry the op had to make this decision and go through it and there's a very simple way to ensure she never has to ever again.

DanBo32 · 14/10/2024 07:31

I can't see all the replies because they've been deleted.

This was a post to help people who are going through or potentially going through the same thing.

If the nasty person (i can only assume they was nasty) read my thread from the very beginning. They'd know, that i was against them. But unfortunately found myself in this position.

Precautions was in place, it isn't my or his fault they failed me.

OP posts:
RosesAndHellebores · 14/10/2024 07:35

I am sorry if offence was taken. It wasn't meant. I am also very sorry that you had to put yourself through this.

DanBo32 · 14/10/2024 07:46

@RosesAndHellebores
Maybe read the full thread before commenting and learn to judge less.

Its an awful experience and a very hard decision to make. This is my first and only time. Never, ever again would I go through this. I was simply trying to put others who may find themselves in the same boat at ease.

OP posts:
DanBo32 · 14/10/2024 07:49

@Soontobe60 Thank you, I am okay xx

OP posts:
DanBo32 · 15/10/2024 13:21

Another update..

Just want to make people aware, that if you do struggle with mental health issues. Be prepared for a mental health crash! - Before I had my procedure (let's call it that)
I was feeling low, alot has happened in our personal lives which was the reason why we chose this in the first place.

I went to the Doctors yesterday because I wasn't feeling right, called the after care team and was advised to see my GP.

Turns out I was in what he called a "rebound in your mental health"

So I urge you, keep on top of your medications. Be 100% certain it is what you want & more importantly. Be kind to yourself. You aren't a bad person. Everyone has their reasons as to why they contemplate this in the first place. To go-ahead it isnt at all easy. Going through the process isn't easy and anyone, I mean anyone has anything to say on negative basis. Just remember, until you are in this position, you just wouldn't ever know. Judge less. I was in your shoes once, believe me.

Ive learnt to judge less and learning to be kinder to myself. Noone on this earth can put me down more than I've already put down myself.

OP posts:
Abee89 · 16/10/2024 01:02

Thank you for this post, I’ve found out I’m unexpectedly pregnant I currently have an 8 month old and I’m suffering from ppd. I have been going back and forth about terminating I know my mental health is not great to go through a pregnancy and bring a child into the world right now but feel so awful about getting a termination. I’m really stuck because either option is going to deteriorate my mental health but I feel like the termination will only effect me where as going ahead affects a child too 😢

DanBo32 · 16/10/2024 05:51

@Abee89
I hear you ❤️ I hope you're okay? 🫂

For me, now it's over. I can honestly say that, although it wasn't easy & I had a crash with my MH. (Because for weeks I've not looked after my own self very well, been too busy making sure everyone else is okay). I do feel that carrying on, would have affected me so much more. I have suffered with PPD with 2 out of the 3 of my children. So I really do sympathise with you.

Make sure you're 100% sure, in either decision. I'm here if you want to message me privately. Lots of love ❤️

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