Abortion & Lost on life

[Acv87]

Hi,

I've been wanting to be a mom for a long time and I have been with my partner for 4 years and a half. After a lot of discussions about this topic he said yes to become a dad.

We got pregnant quickly but not the best news for him. He was not ready, not so young, not a lot of money and making me feel responsible of everything.

I got very scared with the situation and I decided to get an abortion. Now, I'm struggling with all the hormones, with sadness and not knowing what to do with my life

He says that he love and so do I. But I can't refuse to my dreams for one person.

I'm already 37 years old and I feel that I'm not going to find another person to be a mom.

really sorry to hear about your experiences. in the moment it so easy to panic and to listen to what our partners want rather than thinking through what we want and they dont have to deal with the emotional consequences after. it can be useful to have some counselling and some conversations with your partner about whether he will ever feel ready for kids and if not then you decide whether you want to try meeting someone and/or do it alone. plenty of people are having babies into their 40s so you have time.

Hello Acv, I'm so sorry for what you're going through. When the woman is excited to get that positive pregnancy test, but the man isn't, it's emotionally crushing. Feeling like you have to choose between your partner and a child is one of the hardest anyone would ever face. Is your partner much younger than you? Because late 30s is not young to be starting parenthood. Do you usually give in to what he wants? You've been together a long time and he must have known this was something you really wanted. Your sadness may turn into resentment if it seems his wishes were "more important" than yours. Counseling may help but you might also want to consider if this guy is worth staying with. You deserve someone who will be as excited to be a parent as you are. My heart is so broken for you and I hope you will be able to find peace and happiness. There are lots of other people out there, like you said, don't give up on your dreams for this one person who has different priorities.

@gratefulmumma hi! We have been together for 4 years and a half. The last one year and a half as I wanted to do the step of having a baby I talked a lot with him about It. He said yes to It. However, when I got pregnant he said that he wasn't sure, not the right moment, he is not ready on financial terms. He is 43 years old.

He wasn't sure to stay with me if I would keep t'he baby, he says that couples break with or without babies.

I could support to have a baby alone but without a support net. My mom is too old and I could not ask for help.

Currently, after abortion.....he is not sure about wanting a baby. If I try to talk with him.....he is like first enjoy the summer and after that we Will see. I don't have any doubts that he loves me and so do I.

He says that he is now looking at babies and trying to figure out if he sees him in that situation.

Being honest, if someone really wants to be a dad or a mom.....you Will know and tou Will make everything necessary no matter what.