Abortion at 22 weeks

[Lkkmrn]

Before I confirmed the pregnancy I fell while carrying my 3 year old after shower. This causes a delayed injury as my organs move to make way for the growth. As a result, I can't be properly treated for the injury. (Because of pregnancy and also financial issues). I am now 22 weeks pregnant and my husband has been taking over chores and our toddler needs most of the time. I can sense that he is exhausted but I can't strain myself at all, as it will cause an extreme pain on my tailbone area. He has been in a foul mood and we've had fights. I'm not in the right mental state to have another child. I already have the 3 year old. I don't have a support system, friends and family are estranged. I only have my husband who I feel is at his limit. To be honest I don't know what to do. I've been crying and I feel so stressed out. I am considering abortion but I feel so bad about it. I've dreamed about having a girl, I even dreamed about her name. I felt her kicks and I've seen her during doctor visits. I really just need someone in the right mental state to tell me what to do

Hi @Lkkmrn I'm sorry you’re feeling this way. I know things seem tough at the moment, but you willl make it work if you decide to progress with the pregnancy. I have a 4 year age gap between my 2 and it is wonderful to see their bond.

with your injury, have they advised its affecting the pregnancy at all? I assume you’re getting specialist help to be treated?

what does your husband want to do? I know it’s ultimately your decision, but have you spoken to him about it? X

it sounds like you want the baby. what you dont want to have to be on bed rest injured and feeling bad that your husband is doing it all.you are both frustrated and worried about the situation its not about not wanting the baby. at 22 weeks the baby is fully formed and you would have to give birth- its a very traumatic experience especially when you want the baby. i dont know if you are in UK but i would speak to your midwives about how your mood is and get some emotional support. i had a difficult pregnancy emotionally and wanted it to all go away- but thats what you are feeling you are wanting the injuries etc to go not the baby. i think in this scenario its challenging those negative thoughts in your brain that are making you feel down and not want the baby but actually you do you just dont want to have such a difficult pegnancy. really hope you get some support to cope with getting through the next few weeks x

Ouch, tailbone pain is no joke. You said you can't be treated right now, can you be treated after you have the baby? If finances are an obstacle, can a payment plan be set up? You don't want this to become a lifelong problem, or to have it heal incorrectly. Let your husband know how grateful you are for his help while you are in pain and not able to do the things you normally would. Keep up communication with him so he's not just getting annoyed at feeling like he's doing more than his fair share. I agree with the other members who said that abortion at this stage would be extremely hard to deal with, as you say you can feel her move and have seen her on the ultrasound. Things are hard right now but I don't think you will regret your baby once she is in your life.