Want to keep

[Karmachameleon123]

I’m in a true dilemma. I have found out I’m pregnant with an unplanned child. I am 37 and I have 2 children from previous marriage. DD is 14 and DS is 12. My partner and I have been together for 5 years and he also has 2 children from previous marriage 9 & 7. We do not live together due to space in the houses.
Contraception has been a bone of contention as I have chosen to come off mine due to mental health issues, when discussed with OH he said he would get a vasectomy, that was 10 months ago and despite me asking and asking him to sort it he has not.
fast forward to now and we have been caught out, I am 7 weeks pregnant. He does not want another child and told me there is no future for us if I don’t terminate, he is worried about how it will affect his children. I have tried so hard to consider all of my options but I just cannot bring myself to ending the pregnancy and I don’t think I will be able to forgive myself or him for making me do it. I want to keep it and I know that it means he might leave me. His mum has now got involved and told me I have to have an abortion and that I will get over it, that I’m deluded and I’m a bully. That I’m choosing an unwanted thing over him. She has said she is done with me now too.
please help!! Am I being selfish and unreasonable

I couldn’t just read this and not comment.
You’re not being selfish or unreasonable. It’s your choice! If the man who apparently loves you won’t stick by you and you want this baby, then go for it. His mum needs to keep her nose out of it too!
Is he really not going to want to have anything to do with his child when they arrive? And if you do keep the baby I’d make sure I keep that baby far away from his mother.
Do what you want OP. It’s your body and your choice, no one else’s. I know people worry about coping alone and financially but somehow we always pull through. Don’t make your decision based on their bullying tactics. Stay strong and make the decision for yourself x

I don't think you are being selfish and unreasonable, so would ignore anyone who says that. I'm shocked that his mother has said you are 'choosing an unwanted thing' over her son. Maybe she sees it as unwanted now, but would she still see her own grandchild as unwanted after it's born? It seems to me she may just be going along with what her son is saying. In your shoes I would decide what it is you actually want to do and try to ignore the opinions of others. I hope things work out for you whatever you decide x

please, please keep. if you already feel you would struggle an want to keep dont listen to him- they dont have to deal with the emotional fall out. i went ahead as i thought that was what my husband wanted and it was the worst thing that i have ever experienced i resented him so much and it took a long time to move on. i wish more than anything in my whole life that i had listened to what i wanted. i get so angry with how many men dont want any more kids but dont get a v (my h still hasnt got one despite everything!). in terms of impact on kids- plenty of people have old gaps and kids love their younger siblings. its your body and it sounds like you know you want to continue and thats what matters. wishing you the best of luck xxxx