My partner and I have been officially together for a few months, but been seeing eachother for quite some time prior. We've known eachother a few years. I already have a child who is in their early teens. He has no children and we do not live together and it isn't something that is on the cards just yet.
I have been taking contraception but we found out a few days ago that I am pregnant and at a guess, around 4 weeks.
It was a huge shock finding out I am expecting and to be honest, I don't know the point of my post. Maybe advice from those who have experienced similar?
When we found out, he took it well. In terms that, he cuddled me and asked if I was ok and what do I want to do. I said I need to process it. He was honest and said he isn't ready, mentally or financially but he respects my decision and that it won't effect our relationship. I said I dont want to ruin his life and he said 'ruining' his life is extreme.(We are both in our 30s, him being a few years younger than me).
I feel like I want to keep the baby more than not. I cannot imagine having an abortion (I'm not against abortion, but have never needed one and always said I wouldn't)
I had my daughter in my early 20s ( was with her dad from young, for many years) and never considered aborting her. They have wanted a sibling since they could talk!
I said that any future children I have, will come from two parents who love and live with eachother. I don't want a baby for the sake of it. I want a family.
I also think, what if this is my last chance? I know women have children later these days. But being mid 30s, I feel like my chances are lessing by the year. I'd also feel so bad for aborting a baby and not giving my child a sibling while I have the chance.
I have spoken to two close family members. One who says it's not the right time. The other says they think it's amazing and could be the best thing to happen to me and my partner. Both are supportive in whatever I decide.
My partner has a career and things he wants to do. I have always worked but I do all different jobs, with a self employed career that's still progressing alongside it. I wouldn't say my finances are the best.. I think because I had my first child fairly young and made it work, it's made me think why can't I do it again?
I know others won't have my exact story, but had anyone had similar? If so, did you keep the baby? Did it work out with your partner. I know your outcome isn't my outcome. I'm just so confused right now. Doesn't help that my first child has been mentioning a sibling again a lot recently and saying "I know it would never happen but it's nice to imagine"
My partner and I are planning to sit down and talk about it properly. The day we found out we was in shock and briefly spoke about it.
Please no hate, I'm constantly thinking about it and what to do.
Thank you