Help! I am 3 months pregnant and considering abortion

[Nikine]

I am from Italy but have a British boyfriend. I wanted a baby but when I got pregnant he reacted badly, not happy and very anxious/depressed. He said he'll provide and as the baby comes he will love them. However now I feel I made a mistake. Suddenly I realize I would be stuck in the UK for the rest of my life and I will be completely dependent on him not living me. I have a job but without him I couldn't afford a decent house, not rent, not to buy. We're not married or anything, so if we split up I risk living with a very low quality of life. We're both 40..this is my last chance to have a baby but I am so scared of the reality ahead I have taken an appointment to abort this week.

Am I crazy? Please help. Any suggestions, opinion would be good

Abortion is a permanent solution to a problem that may be temporary. In your head, wave a magic wand and see what you want. Whatever you decide - and it is your decision - baby will always be with you.

If you don't want to stay in the UK, where do you want to be?

If you can't afford accommodation what needs to change? Promotion or for the house prices to drop more?

Who can help you with the baby if not him?

Is he just getting used to the idea or is he just not keen? Is the relationship good or falling apart?

Will Catholic guilt send you doolally?

Could you find a counsellor? I think BPAS can help, or any of the clinics. Ask your midwife. If you want the baby - all practical considerations aside - go to Life. They will take care of you and provide the support you need including accommodation. Call them on 08088025433.

Good luck and take care x

He's getting used to the idea that he "has no choice" but to provide if we have a baby because he wants to be an active father if a baby is born. Nonetheless the relationship has never been this rocky. I could go back to Italy and seek support from my family at least for a while but I honestly don't want to be a single mum or even to take the baby away from his dad.

It feels like this was a mistake I didn't realise before. I reached out to some therapy support but they can't do much but let you talk and vent of course.

I am afraid this feeling is temporary but iff it's not i will ruin my life and will be stuck unhappy in the UK with a baby.

Woman have far more rights in the UK than in Italy when it comes to babies and children. You will be in charge whatever happens. You don't have to pander to a man and no one here will judge you for it either. Please consider this before making any rash decisions.