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Pregnancy choices

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Feeling hurt and confused

2 replies

CHERRYPEACH · 04/04/2024 06:59

Hi,

I just signed up just to have somewhere to put my feelings down and be heard. I've just found out I'm pregnant. I already have a blended family so my kids and my stepkids and we've had a daughter together whose 10 months old. We spoke about my partner getting the snip but he said he didn't like the idea because of the pain of it. And so we've been having less than regular sex and using the pull out method. There was 1 time though last month where he didn't do it properly. Anyway he doesn't want the baby and is being very cold towards me. I just feel so angry that he didn't want the snip because it would hurt but has absolutely no problem with me going through pain now physically and emotionally to terminate this pregnancy. I would've been happy to continue the pregnancy if I had his support but I just can't see how I can bring a child into the world that isn't wanted by him. Either way I see it now our relationship will be damaged. I don't even know what I'm asking here, I know no one can make the decision for me I'm just feeling so angry right now and upset.

OP posts:
GSD2024 · 04/04/2024 11:00

Hi @CHERRYPEACH, I'm sorry you are in this position and it's not fair for your partner to 'blame' you and be cold towards you. I don't have any proper advice but didn't want to read and run. If it were me, I would think about what is best for me and my existing family, and if that is continuing the pregnancy then it's down to him whether he continues to be part of that family or not. I know it isn't an easy decision. Do you know how far gone you are? Sending a big hug x

heartbroken22 · 14/04/2024 16:52

But baby is wanted by you right? Ignore him and what he says you can't trust him to get a vasectomy...but is happy with you to terminate and is actually manipulating you into doing it by giving you the cold shoulder.

Do what you feel is right and not based on his feelings. Having my a termination has long term guilt..even if you have another child later...you always think of the one that could have been. You will resent your partner and even yourself if you base your decision based on his feelings. Follow your heart and stay firm. If you do have an abortion. Please get theraphy beforehand. I wish I had done.

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