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Pregnancy choices

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Pregnant again after giving birth 3 months ago!

4 replies

Annonymouspenguin · 23/05/2023 10:52

So two days ago I found out I was pregnant.. again.
A little bit of background.. I have two children (5years old and 3 months old). My partner also has 3 children which we have here regularly, between us we have 5 children.

I gave birth in February, stupidly we had intercourse 3 weeks later (in the moment you don’t think of the consequences) afterwards I thought right I better start taking contraceptives again. Since then I have taken the progesterone only pill.
Anyway, about a month ago I had a nagging feeling to do a pregnancy test. The result was negative. At this point I thought, phew I’m out of the water. A few days ago I had a feeling to do another test just to make sure following a comment a family member made. The test was positive. My mind is now all over the place. I’m really struggling will all of this. I know I won’t cope having another baby physically or mentally, it wouldn’t be fair on my children either if that makes sense. It seems the only option would be a termination (abortion). However, there are problems with this the date of intercourse would put the pregnancy at approximately 11 weeks. This would rule out home abortions wouldn’t it? Which means I’d have to go into hospital for the abortion? Meaning I may be in there a whole day or even over night?? My daughter is exclusively breastfed, I can’t express and I don’t want her to have to have bottles or formula. I can’t leave her for that long.. I am assuming she won’t be allowed to come with me either even if my partner is there too? Once I am in would I be allowed to leave the room to meet him and feed her? Can I discharge myself straight after the second dose is taken on hospital grounds? I have so many questions, I feel like I am going crazy. I feel like if I can’t be at home or have access to my daughter to feed her then I am left with no choice but to continue the pregnancy which I honestly feel is not a good option for myself or my family at all. I feel absolutely terrible about all of this.

I called the clinic this morning as they need to refer me, in my area you cannot self refer. I have been given a consultation for the 1st of June.. over a week away.. this is the soonest they could get me in. Obviously this is a time sensitive matter.. the pregnancy would be around 12 weeks by then.. and then it’s a case of fitting me in for the termination.. it’ll be approximately 13 weeks by then surely? Morally and practically at this point I don’t think termination is an option for me?

I really cannot leave my daughter for the whole day.

Has anyone else been in a similar situation? Has anyone been able to bring a breastfed baby with them or have the termination at home after 10 weeks??
My brain is in overdrive at the moment, I can’t stop overthinking about the whole thing. I have no one to talk to really which doesn’t help at all.
Any response to this will be greatly appreciated! Thank you all in advance!x

OP posts:
Justanotherday2023 · 23/05/2023 21:09

Im so sorry your in this situation. BPAS ruling is your not allowed children in clinic with you. As far as I'm aware pills after 9+6 weeks have to be used in a clinic setting. Maybe acsessing the councilling services before hand would help ease the overthinking a little. Im also an overthinker. Sending hugs

Annonymouspenguin · 23/05/2023 21:37

I read that, I just hoped it may be different with my local health board/hospital (apparently BPAS aren’t funded by the NHS in my area, which I don’t understand). Honestly it’s one of the things making me think I should go ahead with the pregnancy as there is no way I can leave my daughter for a whole day especially with being exclusively breastfed. Yes, that may help.. I have a consultation next Thursday I may ask about counselling then. Thank you ❤️

OP posts:
Justanotherday2023 · 23/05/2023 22:39

I hope it'd be simular within NHS that they offer councilling services before consultations. Maybe contacting them before then maybe useful as youll drive yourself mad with worry and overthinking bless you. I dont think they'd advise over discharging after second dose but I think they'd have to agree to it but give risks etc. Have you looked into the surgical? That may mean less time spent in clinic. I think overthinking things can make situations feel alot worse. Its maybe that you can continue the pregnancy its just the what ifs are making you think your unable too. Only you truly know how you feel about everything though and whats right for youself and your family. I feel continuing a pregnancy on basis of breastfeeding your little one is a short term solution though. Hormones don't help situations either in such a difficult time. 😞 hope everything goes well x

RecycledKettle · 24/05/2023 03:11

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Message deleted by MNHQ. Previously banned poster.

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