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Pregnancy choices

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Pregnant with third child and very unsure

1 reply

Mimps101 · 15/05/2023 21:59

Looking for advice and not judgement please ladies, I have recently found out I am pregnant with my 3rd child and I am seriously undecided on wether I want to go ahead with this pregnancy and have a third child or not. My daughter is 9 in august and very independent and so helpful with her younger brother, she does need a lot of emotional support and she has been referred for an adhd/asd assessment. My son is 2 in September and can be hard work (as most 2 year olds are)🤣 we are relatively luckily when it comes to sleep with him as I was firm from the beginning and would always put him down drowsy but awake so he goes straight to bed same time and falls asleep by himself every night, he is an early riser however and can be awake anything from 4:30 to 6 🤦🏼‍♀️. My partner also has two children from a previous relationship that come and stay with us every other weekend, they are great kids and very easy (aged 7 and 10) so again independent as such. My partner is adamant he doesn’t want anymore and doesn’t want to continue with the pregnancy as we have 4 between us, 2 of each and he doesn’t want anymore and is happy with what he’s got as he says. We are currently in a small 2 bed house so it’s a bit of a squeeze when my bonus 2 come but we are looking to move within the next year or so. My partner earns good money so we are financially stable enough. I am just seriously scared and unsure of wether I want another one or not! I am happy that I have 1 of each and love giving my son a lot of time and attention, my partner doesn’t want anymore and I’m scared it would impact my son who will only be 2 1/2 when this baby comes, will I cope with school runs? Cooking? Entertaining a baby and toddler? Just looking for experiences and advice and sorry my post is so long winded
thank you in advance x

OP posts:
MrsT2808 · 16/05/2023 14:45

Hey!
I've just been in this situation myself. Not exactly the same but 'shall I have this baby' dilemma.
Take yourself out of the 'can I cope' 'will we fit in the house/car' and then ask yourself if you want another baby. It was quite clear to me when I did that, no I don't want another baby.
I've got 2 years and 2 months between my 4 year old daughter and 2 year old son. He is hard! She is the kindest most gorgeous little soul I have ever met and I am so proud of her. I didn't want to spoil what I've already got. I didn't want to risk being poorly, taking my time away from my 2 when they need me so much still. I have a new business that I need to thrive in order to afford things later in life/in a year or 2. We ultimately decided to terminate and I went through the final stage yesterday. The cloud has gone. I'm not crying every day thinking I'm failing my kids. There's no what if's. It's just clear. I've done the right thing for me and my family.
Whatever you choose to do will be the right thing for you all, but only you know the answer. Don't rush into anything. I got the pills and sat on them for 2 weeks until I was 100% sure if what I was doing, set a date and delayed it because I still wasn't sure.
Message me if you need anything x

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