Hi,
gosh I can’t even believe I’m posting this.
I know people will understand about being in this utterly awful waiting period of pre-assessment to consultation with MSI. I’ve a history of haemorrhaging after a missed miscarriage in 2019 and large bleeds at birth after my first two children in 2008 and 2009 so they are doing some checks I suppose to work out what’s safe.
id thought I’d settled on an at home ‘job’ but now feel more inclined to have a surgical procedure and ask them to place an IUD straight away as it appears that can be done.
which is all very sensible and logical but I’m stuck in this awful place where I don’t really want to do this at all but don’t have any other options.
I’m on my own, and have (admittedly) two lovely teens already. But this wasn’t ‘consensual’ and I can’t fathom how I could manage when we’re already struggling. I’m newly self employed so not entitled to any maternity benefits etc, and being the third wouldn’t be entitled to any support anyway.
Our home is currently technically uninhabitable but in negative equity so we’re already just in an extremely rubbish spot. It wouldn’t be right or fair to bring a baby into this level of insecurity and instability or to stretch our already strained resources to another person.
so yes it’s the best thing to do but I just feel completely devastated.