Hi everyone, I'm 38 and have 2 lovely daughters (12 and 8) I am in a new relationship for a while now, and in January I found out I'm pregnant 5 days before the actual missed period. We were extremely happy, as you can imagine. My partner doesn't live with me yet, in fact, he is abroad and is moving with me next week. I had a private scan at week 6 to confirm the pregnancy, and it was all well. However, I have this feeling something is not quite alright since the very beginning. I feel absolutely drained, my mood is down in the deepest hole beyond this world and I have absolutely no control over it. I went for my 12 weeks scan and the doc there congratulate me for the pregnancy and then showed me the nuchal translucency. He asked me if I know what that is. I said I'm aware. Then he said it looked thick. My reaction was.." oh shit" and I panicked. He tried to comfort me, explaining it was 3mm and was still in the range but I could just hear "thick" on repeat in my head. I then went for blood tests and the nurse saw I wasn't ok. She brought a midwife to talk to me. She also tried to calm me down and said to wait for the result and that she will call me in 3 days no matter what the result was. That waiting was the worst experience in my life so far, and I've been through a lot. She called me 2 days later and asked me to go to the hospital so we can talk. I explained I'm on my own and I'll be driving so she better tell me now to give me time to calm down before I get on the road as I know what she will say. And yes 1:5 high risk for Down syndrome. 20min later I was in the hospital aiming for NIPT. Saw my results bhcg - 6.22, Papp-a 0.76. I said I want to know a straight yes or no asap so I can continue breathing as this waiting and uncertainty is killing me from the inside so she offered a CSV. I have an appointment on Monday so about to find out..... I have million thoughts going through my mind, I've taken a decision what to do in case the results confirm the previous .. but I just feel so alone in this and wanted to share and see if anyone else is in that same hell I'm walking through