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Pregnant with my 4th - not sure what to do

1 reply

Mumof3girlsalready · 25/10/2022 01:15

Hey, totally new here and in search of some advice... I'm 29 years old I have three girls already aged 8, 5 and 2... I've just found out I'm pregnant eith my 4th SUPRISE! I'm actually waiting to hear back about an appointment to be sterilised which I've been actively fighting for since having my 3rd daughter as I was even abit unsure when she suprsied us too, ultimately I continued with the pregnancy and I dont regret that atall (although she was my hardest baby and tests me still daily HA) the thing is here I am again in a position where I never wanted to be, where nobody wants to be... do I terminate this pregnancy? I have so many reason for why I should and part of me even wants to but this huge feeling inside of me is so aware I have MY baby mine and my partners 4th baby growing every day inside me, I think I'm about 6 weeks along from my period dates so pretty early still which is good in terms of taking time to think, but ultimately I don't want my life to change, selfishly I don't want to give up my life again and take more from my children already here, we csnt really afford a 4th but that's not my biggest worry as you always make it work we couldnt afford the 3rd but here we are just fine... my partners being very supportive in whatever I choose which is of course good but im struggling, im 90% sure I can't keep this baby but that 10% scares the hell outta me, I dont want to regret the biggest decision of my life which seems so simple when you put it down to I either change my whole life completely forever which I've already done 3 times so know what I'm in for or I do 1 thing to stop any changes atall, but will it change my feelings forever? I also have crohns disease and was told with my 3rd when I wasn't sure on what to do I would likely not being able to have the abortion pill due to my gut potentially not absorbing it and it not working so it would have to be surgical, I never got so far to find out if I would of had to do that as it just seemed so invasive and unnatural compared to a pill which makes you kind of naturally pass the pregnancy I know not natural but i hope you know what I mean... basically I'm just looking for advice, experiences and what to expect if I do go through with an abortion. I'm really sorry for the long post but this has been tormenting my mind for 4 days now 💔

OP posts:
mia546 · 25/10/2022 22:54

Mumof3girlsalready · 25/10/2022 01:15

Hey, totally new here and in search of some advice... I'm 29 years old I have three girls already aged 8, 5 and 2... I've just found out I'm pregnant eith my 4th SUPRISE! I'm actually waiting to hear back about an appointment to be sterilised which I've been actively fighting for since having my 3rd daughter as I was even abit unsure when she suprsied us too, ultimately I continued with the pregnancy and I dont regret that atall (although she was my hardest baby and tests me still daily HA) the thing is here I am again in a position where I never wanted to be, where nobody wants to be... do I terminate this pregnancy? I have so many reason for why I should and part of me even wants to but this huge feeling inside of me is so aware I have MY baby mine and my partners 4th baby growing every day inside me, I think I'm about 6 weeks along from my period dates so pretty early still which is good in terms of taking time to think, but ultimately I don't want my life to change, selfishly I don't want to give up my life again and take more from my children already here, we csnt really afford a 4th but that's not my biggest worry as you always make it work we couldnt afford the 3rd but here we are just fine... my partners being very supportive in whatever I choose which is of course good but im struggling, im 90% sure I can't keep this baby but that 10% scares the hell outta me, I dont want to regret the biggest decision of my life which seems so simple when you put it down to I either change my whole life completely forever which I've already done 3 times so know what I'm in for or I do 1 thing to stop any changes atall, but will it change my feelings forever? I also have crohns disease and was told with my 3rd when I wasn't sure on what to do I would likely not being able to have the abortion pill due to my gut potentially not absorbing it and it not working so it would have to be surgical, I never got so far to find out if I would of had to do that as it just seemed so invasive and unnatural compared to a pill which makes you kind of naturally pass the pregnancy I know not natural but i hope you know what I mean... basically I'm just looking for advice, experiences and what to expect if I do go through with an abortion. I'm really sorry for the long post but this has been tormenting my mind for 4 days now 💔

Hey I've had a abortion before a surgical one when I was 17 and I'm now also pregnant again just gone five weeks and also going through the same thing as I'm not sure if this is the right choice for me at this stage in my life. Weigh out the pros and cons & also follow your heart, six weeks is really early so if you did decide to terminate nothing has fully formed yet however if you take longer the baby is more developed and you'd be more sad. My surgical procedure was quite traumatising as I was put to sleep and woke up crying & having instant regret however I believe that was down to being further along 8 weeks and not making the decision for myself. Regardless of what you do it'll be hard & it'll be sad but you'll get over it whatever you decide to do just make sure it's what YOU want and that you're happy with your choice xxx

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