Pregnant again

[Theowlwhowasafraid]

Hi all,

im in a bit of tizz at the moment, my baby is 11 months (1 in 2 weeks!) and I’ve just found out I’m pregnant again, I’m in total shock. I feel numb, I don’t know how I feel. My husband is away with work and in a house full of colleagues so don’t want to tell him this over the phone.

I am due to return from maternity leave in 3 weeks and I’ve been trying to find a new job as I hate my current one and I couldn’t do that now, we want to move house to a bigger place but with a baby and one on the way it’s going to be so hard. I also had HG with my daughter and I’m terrified of being that sick again. I feel guilty that my daughter will need me as she starts nursery and I’m so conflicted. I have just been in tears this evening.

I was tracking my cycles but no ovulation testing, it took us nearly two years to conceive my daughter so I stupidly didn’t think. I only got my periods back a couple of months ago. I must’ve ovulated early.

can someone offer any advice? Is two at 20 months a nightmare, is this a normal processing? I can’t believe I’m even considering my options here, I was always so careful and I know I do want my daughter to have a sibling but I don’t know if this is the right time. I really don’t know.

If you don't want to be pregnant, it's totally fine to end your pregnancy. I was in a similar situation, chose to terminate and didn't look back. I went on to have my 2nd when it was actually feasible to do so. I was also looking for a new job and we were about to move out of a flat into a house with a bigger mortgage - we just couldn't. It's OK to not go ahead if that's what you choose xx

@Devo1818 thank you, I needed to hear that it’s ok to choose that, I just can’t believe I’m even considering it xx

DD1 was 8 months old when I conceived DD2 and I was absolutely devastated. I'd also had HG with DD1 and was terrified to go through that again as I'd been so ill. I decided to keep the baby but was so distraught that I had to have therapy to deal with it.
I was sick a total of 5 times during the pregnancy which was amazing and the pregnancy was so much easier than my first.

They're 3 and 4 now and I can't imagine my life without DD2. Life with 2 kids was nowhere near as scary as I'd thought it would be. They're best friends and I love watching them grow together.

Thanks both! I’ve had a chat with my husband and we are going to go ahead (all being well of course!) I’m absolutely terrified and worried about how I’ll manage. 2 under 2 but. I will manage! And like you say, they’ll be so close in age and hopefully best of friends

Yes, this is all normal, you are weighing up what might be right for you, your child and your family unit at this time. You have no need to feel guilty about thinking this through.

I have a 20 month gap between my two, both planned but fell pregnant super fast with DC2. It was hard work at times - both in nappies and having a double buggy etc but it was also very amazing and so nice having them so close together. All the best, I’m sure all will be fine

It was a while ago now but I had 17 months between my 2. They’re now 13 and 14.
having them close together helped to get all the nappies and weaning etc all out the way in one go. All the high chairs, buggy’s, car seats etc.
then they went through nursery and primary school and high school together.
it was tough at times but I’m glad they were so close in age.
good luck to you whatever you decide xxx