Scared .. please help

[STM22]

Hi everyone, so last Monday I found out I was pregnant.. something I always thought of as a happy time. Well it isn't for me 😔 and me and my partner have decided to have an abortion.
I can't tell anyone around me (other then my partner) what I'm doing as everyone would be so disgusted in me, however it's really not the right time for me, we have just brought a house which needs a lot of work doing to it, and I have terrible anxiety so I'm not mentally ready for this.

On Monday I'm going for a scan, and then all being well coming home with the pills on Monday.
I will take the first one on Monday and then the other ones on Tuesday but I'm SO scared.
I have everything going through my head..
will it hurt so bad?
Will I be ok?
I guess it's the fear of the unknown isn't it. The nurse was lovely on the phone but scared me as she started to read out statistics and some people get sepsis after this treatment, some people have a massive bleed out, some people have to have a hysterectomy etc
I'm worrying what if it goes wrong? And people don't know what Iv done
I feel so low
Please can someone help me 😢😢😢

Hi @STM22
im sorry you’re feeling so scared. I had my medical termination nearly 5 weeks ago now and I had the exact same anxieties as you. They have to give you those statistics as although unlikely they’re still possible and they need to let you know all risks so you know what you’re consenting to. It’s a very very safe procedure though and you have the best chances of being absolutely fine.
the pain for me wasn’t too bad at all, I took the codeine they sent to me. I’m now on my first period since the termination and to honest these cramps are much worse!
will your partner be around for second tablets? I was home alone but partner was on end of phone if I needed him to come home.

your situation sounds just like mine did I could have written it myself. I had mine at around 5 weeks and it wasn’t half as bad as what I read. In terms of the pain I had maybe 10mins when I was doubled up and then it was over and mild cramps not going to lie it hurt but not like I thought it would. Hopefully coming up to my 2nd period the first one back I bled so much more than with the termination. It’s a scary time but you will get through it and the nurses on the end of the phone were lovely, I phoned a couple of times through the process and just remember when it comes to it if you don’t want to take the pills you don’t have to just because you have been given them. I had a counselling session too when I got my period back as had a few days of being tearful and she was so helpful and talked me through my feelings. Don’t be afraid to reach out for help and to talk to someone, they are there for that xx