Abortion at 14/15 weeks

[Anna1998]

Hello, I recently found out that I’m 13 weeks pregnant and currently trying to decide whether I should keep or terminate this pregnancy. This is such a hard decision that I am feeling the weight of the world on. I’m very torn. Does anyone have any information on abortion at a later stage such as 14 weeks? Would it be a surgical or medical procedure? Would I be put to sleep? Will I be able to still have children in the future? How long is the recovery time? Thank you I’m advance

Weigh up the pros and cons on having the baby or a termination. Everyone’s experience is different. The aftermath of your decision is hard also whichever you choose to do

I had a medical at 15 weeks. First set of tablets didn't do anything but not long after the second my waters broke, the pain was a bit like labor pains. Only lasted maybe 30 minutes. Though unfortunately I then bleed all over my bathroom floor a week later and had to go to an emergency appointment in the gynecology ward and got my cervix scrapped which was awful. Now a week after that and bleeding almost gone.

I would strongly recommend surgical at that gestation.

I had surgical at 10 weeks and honestly, I just went to sleep and when I woke up it was all over.

When I went to the clinic, they asked if I would like to speak to a midwife/councillor before going through with it, is there anybody you can talk to at BUPAS that could help you come to a decision?

My heart goes out to you, it's a shitty decision to make and really tough. You've got to do what's best for you, I know that's easier said than done and I hope you have some real life support around you ❤️.

I had surgical at 12 weeks. From what I remember, Marie Stopes would not prescribe medical past just under 10 weeks.

I had a confirmation scan and chat with a very kind nurse. On the day, I was put under so don't remember the procedure itself, if that's what you want to know? I wasn't really in any pain after but that may vary. I was back at work after two days - I physically could have gone sooner but wanted to give myself time.

It shouldn't affect future fertility, but they will go through possible complications with you as with any medical procedure. I was given the option to have contraception fitted while I was under so you may want to ask about that if it's something you're interested in.

Practicalities aside, please be gentle with yourself both while making the decision and after if that's what you choose. The right decision for you doesn't mean you can't also find it difficult or painful.

All the absolute best from me 💚

I had a termination at 8 weeks and it was a medical one...had I known how it was (although fairly easy) I'd never have it done...I've been bleeding on and off and now have to have antibiotics...id rather have suffered the sickness and had my baby by the endZ

I think for you at 14 weeks it will be surgical. Why do you want a termination btw?

Thank you so much for your replies💗 if I go through with it I think I would definitely want surgical and to be put under, I would hate to be awake to experience it I think that would make it even harder. Thank you for suggesting that I think counselling would be so beneficial to me. I’ve written another post about why I’m contemplating this but it’s because this was unplanned due to failed birth control, I’ve only recently graduated from uni and even though I work full time I don’t have any savings so I’m not financially stable. My boyfriend and I rent at the moment and a lot of our money goes on that and bills. My partner works full time as an estate agent recently but if I have a baby we wouldn’t be able to afford child care so we would struggle just on his salary alone. I have always wanted to be a mother and have our own family one day so this makes the decision even harder but I worry this wouldn’t be fair on the child considering our money circumstance, feels the whole situation is so unfair and I’m heartbroken about it

I'm in Scotland so I had no option to go for surgical. If I was given the option I would've went surgical and under ga. People go through it for all different reasons. At first I felt relief, now a little bit of sadness. Though I 100% know it was the right decision for myself and family. When going through it my Dr advised I done it sooner rather than later if knew 100%. I hope all goes well for you whatever you decide.

I had a medical at 17 weeks. I had to travel over 300 miles to go to a clinic that would do it. They really pushed for D&E because of my gestation but I declined. It was a 3 day stay, first day I had to take the first pill and had to return the next day. Waiting time was awful and the clinic was absolutely packed. They sent me up to the treatment rooms, I had to share with 3 other ladies and there wasn't much privacy as the curtains were tiny and barely covered anything. They gave me the first set of pills and it took 4 sets and about 8 hours for them to kick in. The pain got bad, very similar to full term childbirth but came on quicker and felt more intense. Around an hour after the pain kicked in I found myself laying on the bathroom floor screaming because it got really bad and I couldn't keep any painkillers down so the nurse had to inject pethidine into my leg because apparently I was disturbing the other patients and needed a quick solution. But shortly after that my waters broke and the pain went instantly. I did have to push because of the size of baby but I was just so relieved the pain was gone. After they cut the cord they let me hold him and I wrapped him in a blanket. They made me sit on a comode thing until they were sure the placenta was out and gave me another injection but not sure what it was for as I was just so tired and couldn't really stay awake at this point as it was after midnight. They did handprints and took him away to "package" him in a special container which I found really upsetting as they didn't let me use a box I had specially for him. I slept and went home the next day. Mentally I found it very difficult, 2 years on I still struggle but have had an earlier termination since but I'm still affected by the first one. Personally I didn't feel it was the right decision for me but I was and still am living at home and they wanted me to do it. It was really tough on my mental health and I had very little support but the actual physical side of it was fine and recovery time was about 5 weeks. I did feel sore afterwards and my injection sites were very achy and couldn't walk at all for a few days. I do have an incredibly low pain tolerance though, even though I've given birth to an 8 pounder with no pain relief I struggled with coping through the contractions because of how quickly they came on. I feel surgical would have definitely been easier physically but just wasn't something I could go through for personal reasons but if you get the option I'd definitely consider it as from what I've heard the recovery is much easier. Good luck with whatever you decide, it's never an easy decision to make

@Fuzzyhippo oh my gosh that sounds so traumatic. I hope you're okay hun. Much love it takes a lot to have the strength of a woman xx

It will be surgical.

Yes of course you’ll be able to have children after! You’d have more risk of complications from a full term birth.

Recovery time should be pretty short.

It sounds like it’s a sensible and well thought out decision.

It will depend on where you live and who the contract provider is

BPAS/MSI/ NUPAS will be a surgical treatment

Some NHS will offer either surgical or a late medical depending on your suitability and what you want

I’m currently 15 weeks pregnant and my boyfriend has told me and doesn’t want the baby. He isn’t a bad man but just says he can’t cope emotionally, his parents also are not on board and he is so close to them. We are older parent (40) and both have a child from previous marriages. We have a mortgage and live together. I just don’t know what to do. I love him so much and I’m so scared of what the future holds for myself and my current children if we split, the thought of putting them through this again kills me. He said if I abort he will support and love me always. I’m not sure I can go through with an abortion at this late stage, I don’t even know if it’s possible. I had my scan and midwife appointments and can feel the baby. I’m so sad and torn.

@Maddie210 follow your heart and only make that choice for yourself. Not based on him or what he wants. You're carrying the child. Not him and not his parents. You'll end up hating him.

Thank you.. xx

Just to add I had an abortion at 8 weeks got pregnant again and wanted to abort again for health. My husband and family stopped me and I'm grateful they did. When I would moan about it being tough being sick and unable to eat and wanting to kill myself they were their for me and I'm so grateful. I'm nearly 32 weeks and I can't wait to meet baby. I didn't feel like this before. I accepted the abortion but right now feeling baby kick and move. I'm dreaming about what could have been and wish I wasn't put into that position where I felt it was the right decision. Even with this pregancny I look back at 6-14 weeks hiding and just being there in my own mind because of the sickness. Never felt so lonely but just needed that support to carry on.