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Pregnancy choices

This topic is for sharing experiences of pregnancy choices; to debate the ethics of termination, visit our Politics or Chat forums.

Original poster

Scan before termination

53 replies

LOSTladyscarlett · 20/06/2022 22:03

Just wondering if anyone else refused a scan before a termination.

I really don't want to have one. I just want it over and done with.
My mind is made up I have one child I don't want another and financially can't cope with another anyways.

But I really just don't want to have a scan. Also how far gone were people when they had their termination and could you have the pills?

Thanks for reading

OP posts:
oldcatlady88 · 20/06/2022 23:23

I didn't go through with it in the end and she's currently asleep in my arms but that's irrelevant.
I rang Marie Stopes and they sent me pills out. I think it was something to do with covid I believe they change it to minimise face to face apps and have kept it? I rang them, had a consultation with a nurse over the phone and the next day the pills turned up. No scan.
I think if you've further on they do need to do a scan to date the pregnancy. I mean I guess you could refuse it as they can't force you to do anything. But it's for your benefit to make sure you're getting the correct procedure x

itsabouttimetoo · 20/06/2022 23:34

If you’re sure of your dates then you don’t need a scan, but I believe if it’s contraception failure they will scan as you could be further along. BPAS have notoriously long waiting times - ring MSI Reproductive Choices (formally Marie Stopes) - they will help!

Original poster
LOSTladyscarlett · 20/06/2022 23:35

oldcatlady88 · 20/06/2022 23:23

I didn't go through with it in the end and she's currently asleep in my arms but that's irrelevant.
I rang Marie Stopes and they sent me pills out. I think it was something to do with covid I believe they change it to minimise face to face apps and have kept it? I rang them, had a consultation with a nurse over the phone and the next day the pills turned up. No scan.
I think if you've further on they do need to do a scan to date the pregnancy. I mean I guess you could refuse it as they can't force you to do anything. But it's for your benefit to make sure you're getting the correct procedure x

Mentally and financially I'm not in a place to keep it.

Plus I already have my little boy. If I was better off and didn't suffer depression things maybe different.

I was thinking about refusing. But I wanted to get people opinions and experiences before I just refused. But that was going to be my option if they sent me.

It's nice to hear they don't delay in sending the pills out though I ready that some people waited 3 weeks on the internet. So to hear so many people got them the next day is good

OP posts:
Theoriginalinvisiblewoman · 20/06/2022 23:36

I had a medical termination the week before last, received the pills at home through BPAS. They did ask me if I wanted a scan but didn’t insist I have one? I decided not to, simply because I didn’t want to delay the process (I was nearly 6 weeks at this point). They may not have insisted I have one because I knew the exact date of the first day of my last period (I track it on an app and I’m very fastidious about this), my previous period was completely normal (and I’ve had normal, regular periods for more than 12 months) and I knew exactly when I conceived because it was the only time I’d had sex with my husband since my period finished and my next one not arriving… 😕 Perhaps if you’re not 100% sure of all relevant information they might insist on scanning you? But not my experience at all… I hope your call goes OK 💐

Original poster
LOSTladyscarlett · 20/06/2022 23:43

Theoriginalinvisiblewoman · 20/06/2022 23:36

I had a medical termination the week before last, received the pills at home through BPAS. They did ask me if I wanted a scan but didn’t insist I have one? I decided not to, simply because I didn’t want to delay the process (I was nearly 6 weeks at this point). They may not have insisted I have one because I knew the exact date of the first day of my last period (I track it on an app and I’m very fastidious about this), my previous period was completely normal (and I’ve had normal, regular periods for more than 12 months) and I knew exactly when I conceived because it was the only time I’d had sex with my husband since my period finished and my next one not arriving… 😕 Perhaps if you’re not 100% sure of all relevant information they might insist on scanning you? But not my experience at all… I hope your call goes OK 💐

Thank you for sharing.

I'm pretty sure I know my exact dates.

Xx

OP posts:
Original poster
LOSTladyscarlett · 20/06/2022 23:44

itsabouttimetoo · 20/06/2022 23:34

If you’re sure of your dates then you don’t need a scan, but I believe if it’s contraception failure they will scan as you could be further along. BPAS have notoriously long waiting times - ring MSI Reproductive Choices (formally Marie Stopes) - they will help!

Yes contraception failure but I know my dates as it's been the only time I'm well
Over 7 months and I'm most certainly not that far gone. Xx

OP posts:
PyongyangKipperbang · 20/06/2022 23:54

At the clinic I went to they wouldnt give me the pills without the scan(NHS), it was so they could confirm that I was suitable for the medical termination. I saw nothing, they said nothing other than to confirm I was eligible, it was nothing like a scan in a pregnancy that you are continuing with.

I was 9 weeks.

oldcatlady88 · 21/06/2022 09:30

@LOSTladyscarlett I understand and I'm sorry to hear that, I separated from her dad not long after she was born so we're living with my parents and I suffered PND, so although I love her with all my heart I can understand your decision 100%.
Yes it was really quick and it was around March time last year so still during COVID and they were still very efficient.
I've just checked my emails and it was actually BPAS not MSI. I rang them one evening, the next day a nurse rang me and the day after the pill arrived in the post along with a contraceptive injection. I actually booked 3 abortions right up until I was about 18 weeks and very nearly went through with them. Everyone I spoke to was lovely.

Willow8383 · 21/06/2022 13:20

@LOSTladyscarlett I had an appointment with BPAS last week and wasn’t offered a scan. They asked me if I am sure when my last period was, and other questions to ascertain if there are any risks, and then offered to send me the medication to take at home. I asked for a scan because I wanted to be 100% sure that there are no undetected issues like ectopic pregnancy but they said this is not necessary if there are no indicators of risks, and we can date the pregnancy because I’m sure when my last period was, my periods are regular, etc.

Original poster
LOSTladyscarlett · 21/06/2022 13:26

Willow8383 · 21/06/2022 13:20

@LOSTladyscarlett I had an appointment with BPAS last week and wasn’t offered a scan. They asked me if I am sure when my last period was, and other questions to ascertain if there are any risks, and then offered to send me the medication to take at home. I asked for a scan because I wanted to be 100% sure that there are no undetected issues like ectopic pregnancy but they said this is not necessary if there are no indicators of risks, and we can date the pregnancy because I’m sure when my last period was, my periods are regular, etc.

Thank you for replying.

How fast did the pills get out to you?
I've read that they can take weeks but others have said the next day?

I've said it before I feel stupid for getting myself in this situation. I just want it over and done with. I have my call tomorrow I'm quite nervous to be honest xx

OP posts:
loves2plan · 21/06/2022 13:30

I had a medical abortion at home last year. All through BPAS. I went for a scan so they could make sure everything was 'normal' with the pregnancy before prescribing the pills but I didn't look at the screen and there was no sound or anything. Pills came about a week after they, all in all the whole thing took less than a month from finding out I'd say

Willow8383 · 21/06/2022 13:33

They said it would be 3-4 days but I had to travel for a funeral and stay away from my home base for a couple of weeks so I asked if I can pick them up instead, and they arranged a next day pick up for me. They are really nice and accommodating.

Yes, I feel the same…but I think we shouldn’t beat ourselves up over it, remember to be kind to yourself xx

Threebutterflies · 21/06/2022 13:47

@LOSTladyscarlett
that seems like a very long wait. I’d try and find another clinic and see if anywhere can do it sooner x

SEJ1789 · 21/06/2022 19:25

I had to have a Scan as I had some bleeding literately once but they wanted to check it was ok. I knew my dates of last period but had taken meds to delay my next one so my dates were a bit off. I went with MSI and took two weeks in total for me to take the pills. 1 week for consultation and then had scan 5 days later. Just waiting to do my 3 week test to see if I’m negative.

Cherrytree1621 · 21/06/2022 20:17

If you're unsure how many weeks you are, you need a scan. I just recently had a medical at 15 weeks. I thought I would've been around 9 weeks but obviously I was way off.

Original poster
LOSTladyscarlett · 22/06/2022 11:34

Update.

They're making me go for a scan they said if I refuse they won't help me...

The only appointment is in 2 weeks that will take me to 9 weeks

I'm worried and upset and just want this over... anyone had the abortion by pill at 9 weeks?

What happened. I'm so scared.

OP posts:
Willow8383 · 22/06/2022 12:46

@LOSTladyscarlett I'm so sorry to hear that, how stressful for you! Can you ask somewhere else for an earlier appointment - I believe there's BPAS, MIS and also the NHS? Would going to a private gynae and paying for it be an option?

loves2plan · 22/06/2022 12:59

@LOSTladyscarlett so sorry you're having a hard time. I was just over 8 weeks when I had mine at home, I won't lie it hurt and I bled a lot. But it was over in a few hours and I knew it was the right thing for me at that time. I hope it helps that you don't have to see the foetus on the scan or anything, it's just for their benefit to date your pregnancy and provide appropriate treatment.
Also as PPs have said, maybe try a different provider and see if they can offer you anything sooner. I went through BPAS and they made everything really simple and it took a lot of pressure off that I was feeling.

Original poster
LOSTladyscarlett · 22/06/2022 13:35

loves2plan · 22/06/2022 12:59

@LOSTladyscarlett so sorry you're having a hard time. I was just over 8 weeks when I had mine at home, I won't lie it hurt and I bled a lot. But it was over in a few hours and I knew it was the right thing for me at that time. I hope it helps that you don't have to see the foetus on the scan or anything, it's just for their benefit to date your pregnancy and provide appropriate treatment.
Also as PPs have said, maybe try a different provider and see if they can offer you anything sooner. I went through BPAS and they made everything really simple and it took a lot of pressure off that I was feeling.

I've tried msi don't cover my area. Trying my doctor.

I just feel let down they're letting me go longer. Xx

OP posts:
Original poster
LOSTladyscarlett · 22/06/2022 13:36

Willow8383 · 22/06/2022 12:46

@LOSTladyscarlett I'm so sorry to hear that, how stressful for you! Can you ask somewhere else for an earlier appointment - I believe there's BPAS, MIS and also the NHS? Would going to a private gynae and paying for it be an option?

I've tried msi they don't cover my area bpas are who making me wait and I've not heard back from the nhs yet.

I can't afford private either I'm a single mum

OP posts:
SEJ1789 · 22/06/2022 13:57

I think there is one called NUPAS as well they were the first ones I called and I cried on the phone when they said they didn’t cover my area. It really seems pot luck on who you get and the wait times in the area

Dogsandbabies · 22/06/2022 14:21

I think the reason they need to do a scan is to date the pregnancy and ensure they are operating within the law. Everyone will need to scan you. Private or not.

Could you ask them to say nothing during the scan and not look? My scan pre abortion was a very quick one. Literally to date and take a copy for their records.

I know it sounds horrible but it may get you to the end goal. You have my complete sympathies.

Original poster
LOSTladyscarlett · 22/06/2022 14:24

SEJ1789 · 22/06/2022 13:57

I think there is one called NUPAS as well they were the first ones I called and I cried on the phone when they said they didn’t cover my area. It really seems pot luck on who you get and the wait times in the area

Just checked they don't cover my area either

OP posts:
Original poster
LOSTladyscarlett · 22/06/2022 14:26

Dogsandbabies · 22/06/2022 14:21

I think the reason they need to do a scan is to date the pregnancy and ensure they are operating within the law. Everyone will need to scan you. Private or not.

Could you ask them to say nothing during the scan and not look? My scan pre abortion was a very quick one. Literally to date and take a copy for their records.

I know it sounds horrible but it may get you to the end goal. You have my complete sympathies.

It's the fact I'm being made to wait 2 weeks for one. And I'm 100% certain of dates as it's been the only time.

By the time the 2 weeks comes I'll be 9 weeks and over the time to take the pills

Other thing is I have to somehow find childcare even though I have literally no one because they said I can't take my son with me.

I have no family about I live no where near then.

I know it seems I'm moaning but I'm just scared, worried ect

OP posts:
Dogsandbabies · 22/06/2022 14:31

Oh I am so sorry, I have just seen your update. You don't sound like you are moaning. It's a very difficult time!

I know it isn't the same but I had a missed miscarriage last year at 10 weeks and had to take the pills and pessaries. I was fine. It was painful but manageable with paracetamol/ibuprofen. I really hope everything goes well for you.