Hi, I'll start by saying I'm 26, the father will be 28. We dated from when I was 16-22 on and off. I've seen him sporadically throughout the years apart. He has a lot of narcissistic tendencies, ie. emotionally unavailable/avoidant, infidelities on dating apps and presumably IRL, claimed to want me to be the mother of his children and buy a house together recently (not that I believed him, or even considered it). He lied to me that he wasn't still with his gf, had been saying for several months now how unhappy he is, but clearly was staying until their long planned trip overseas in early July. The way he is though, I think he's afraid to be alone and hates dealing with others' emotions, and will likely not even end up ending the relationship.
I found out June 5 after I was a few days late and called him. We met up for the day and talked about what to do. He claimed he supported whatever decision I made, but felt we weren't ready and should try in the future. A few days later, when I asked him point blank if he would be there for them he said he "didn't know." A few days after that, I realized he blocked me on everything even tho he said he would come to the appointment and help with anything I needed.
This is my first time being pregnant. It's not that I don't want kids eventually, the circumstances just aren't ideal and there are a few things I would've like to have done first. Namely, trying streaming, putting myself thru uni, living abroad/traveling.
I really don't want to regret not going thru with it. I would have full support with my family. But I'd be tying myself to him for 18 years if he doesn't manage to dodge CS and if he ever decided to be apart of their life. And part of me knows I could just move on from him completely and wait to start a family with the LOML, because if I stayed in my current city to go thru with it (family is here) I feel it'd be way harder to find my person.
Sorry for the lengthy context, I really appreciate any unbiased advice or perspectives. It's been a long 2 weeks.