So im 8weeks pregnant..i already have 4 kids.
I also have a terrible partner, some would say abusive, hasent always been this way but for the past two years hes changed into a monster with a weed addiction.
He will leave the house day after day to be with friends, i would care for the 4 children whilst i study at home .I do everthing in the home , i mean everything..its awful.Whats worse is that he messess up his jobs and we are often left without money or food.He has a weed addiction so when hes withdrawing you guessed it the arguments!.If i ask him for help im told to fuck off, he tells me to "fuck off" infront of his mates .
Even worse is that we moved into our council home 5months ago and my name is not on the contract because i had to look after the kids whilst he went and signed.So now if pick him up on that fact he aint bothered with his kids its "get out of my house"-pregnant or not .He wouldnt let me back in a few weeks back and i had to call the police to let me in with the children.
He calls me names today it was "hore", keeps me in the house by going to his friends knowing i cant leave the older two whilst there out playing.Im totaly left,ignored, neglected,often sat on the sofa every evening lonely feeling
helpless.If i havent noticed his coffee is all gone and i went out to the shops that day (and didnt bring any home) im shouted at for "controlling him"??.
Most of the money we receive comes into my account being the mother, hes constantly jealous, calls me names, slams doors, turns the house over, everything is my fault hes never in the wrong .We cant go out as a family because he starts getting angry , shouts at the kids , people are looking, im so ashamed and if i try to calm it down he shouts at me!, he pulls them about hurts them only once a guy dared to shout at my partner asking him WTF do you think you are doing!, hes so embarassing to be in public with, He has ruined so many family days through weed withdrawls, so then he started taking spliffs with him to calm him but he just ends up stoned and oblivious and again people looking at why is this dude off his nut?.To his friends and neighbours hes great but behind closed doors hes neglectfull and awful .
So know im pregnant how can i bring a baby into a warzone , i hide in the house to get away from him, im scared and shake when he starts.I cant talk to my mum as he gets paranoid.Im trapped .
He wont leave , how do i get him removed? if i could do that id probably keep the baby , but i cant have this baby with him in the house no way!
so im sat waiting for a call about an abortion.. :(, im 38, hes 32
x