Unwanted Pregnancy please help

[Girl123456]

So where to start... I recently had a little boy last December, he is now going on for 6 months old. Just before he was born I was redundant so have spent the majority of my maternity leave anxious about finding a new job in good time for the end of my maternity leave in September.

To add to this my and my husband to be are due to get married in September this year.

I have just found out that I am 5 weeks pregnant and I am in total shock after being on contraception! We are in a loving relationship, own a house but are only just managing to get by with me on maternity pay and partner working in retail.

It may sounds shallow but it really wasn't the plan to be pregnant on my wedding day and to have to endure another pregnancy after only just starting to truly recover!

We've sat and tried to weigh up all of the options but I'm unsure how we could afford two babies so close together and if I were to find another job would they hire me or even keep me on if they knew I was pregnant? Especially in current times where jobs are hard to come by.

The plan was to conceive in a year's time to have a big enough gap to break up child care costs, and I would hopefully be a little more established in a new job.

I'm at a complete loss I don't see how we manage with another baby and this really isn't what either of us want right now but I also hate the thought of terminating a baby and not being able to live with the consequences...

Any advice?!

if I were to find another job would they hire me or even keep me on if they knew I was pregnant?
They’re not allowed to discriminate against you and would have to treat you exactly the same as a non-pregnant applicant/employee. You don’t even have to tell them you’re pregnant until quite far down the line so don’t worry about that.

Sorry you’re in this position, I’m sure someone will be able to advise you better soon

I’m so sorry you are in this position . You may get more helpful advice if you move this post to the Pregnancy Choices topic, especially as your title describes the pregnancy as unwanted.

Wow what a predicament . So Ideally they’d be 2 years (ish) between your kids and not 15 months (ish) . Is the few months between 15 months and 2 years worth the emotions (depending on you) of a termination. Definitely not an easy time for you and your family

I’m so sorry you’re in this situation.
It’s not ideal and only you can make the decision as to whether you continue. It will no doubt be harder than your original plan. I have a 14 month old and a newborn and the pregnancy/now is very tough I won’t lie.

Personally for the sake of a years difference I would go ahead but that’s just my personal opinion.

If you are not 100% sure of a termination then it's probably not the right thing for you.

Having kids close in age with a tight budget is hard but there could be financial help available to you. You have time to think about it further before making a decision you can not reverse.

We conceived our 3rd not long before my MA ended, I was made redundant when pregnant with our 2nd (they have a 16.5mth gap). It was not great looking for work with a bump, they're not supposed to discriminate but they do and just find a different reason to say you're not suitable. I've been a sahm since then, it was tough financially but things got better.

Evening, @Girl123456 - we hope you don't mind but we've moved your thread to Pregnancy Choices and we hope you get some useful advice here.

Best of luck.

@Girl123456 I’m sorry you’re in this position. I was recently too.

My tuppence would be - don’t try and be 100%. You can’t be about something so big and permanent. You just have to do the best you can.

Work out how you feel at times. Are you usually wanting to keep or not? What’s the overall feeling?

And you’ll make the best decision you can at this time. Whatever you do.

My DD1 was 8 months when I got pregnant with DD2. I was genuinely devastated as I'd had a traumatic pregnancy with DD1 and didn't want to go through that again. I had to have therapy as I was so depressed about it.

DD2 is incredible and brings us so much joy. They both play so well together and are becoming best friends.
We found DD2 wasn't as expensive as we already had most of the stuff.

Obviously, you need to do what you feel is right for you and your family. I guess the point of my comment is it may feel like the end of the world but it may work out better than you ever imagined xx