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Pregnancy choices

This topic is for sharing experiences of pregnancy choices; to debate the ethics of termination, visit our Politics or Chat forums.

Don’t know what to do

1 reply

5000diem · 05/02/2021 01:34

Hi I really need to just write this down as It’s all I can think about.

I’m 42, obese and have just I found out at the weekend I’m pregnant. I’m married with a 12 year old and am very happy with our life. We both work full time, have a great life and our child is everything to me.

On seeing that positive test, I burst into tears, I just don’t think I can go through it all again. I’m now in my 40’s, our house is waaay too small and our first born is autistic. In the early years I really struggled & had PND. I just don’t think I can go through that again. My OH is devastated and can barley look at me but if the second child was more autistic than my first born I don’t know how we would cope and I’m pretty sure no 2 would have autism.

But there’s a small part of me that’s thinking am I throwing away my last chance to have another child? I keep telling myself that A 12 year age gap is huge plus I’d be heading towards late 40’s by the time it starts school! I’m conflicted at the moment, I can’t talk to anyone about it.

Has anyone else been in a similar position? I had an abortion when I was in my teens and never thought I would be in this position as an adult, certainly not one in her 40’s! I just feel like such an idiot.

I’ve got an appointment on Monday to talk about a medical termination which is scaring the life outta me.

Sorry not expecting anyone to respond, just needed to get all that off my chest.

OP posts:
honeysuckle21 · 05/02/2021 14:14

I've been through one recently at 40, never expected this to happen at my age! If I had of been in a happy relationship I would of gone ahead even though my youngest is 10. I was also not in the right circumstances, not enough bedrooms and thought of facing work and a baby at my age, I'm tired enough as it is. I don't regret it just a bit sad it couldn't happen the way my life is now, I don't know either if I'll have another baby as I'll have to find a better man/different house etc I'll be too old by the time that's all sorted out. I do have DC already that I'm greatful for so I should count my blessings.

When you say your DH is devastated why is that happy/disappointed? At you being pregnant.

It has to be your choice though x

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