Is it normal to feel guilty?

[cherry101]

Please no judgment I have never been in this situation before! Me and partner have decided to terminate(I hate that word) we have been together less than 10 months, even though I have known him years. We don't live together? Both work, we both have debts we are saving up To pay these off and to live together at some point in the future too. We both have children from previous relationships and have discussed having another in the future as in early 30s. I was on the pill and somehow got pregnant' I have been on long term antibiotics for a medical condition, I have researched and been advised by doctors taking this AB in early pregnancy carries massive risk of serious birth defects and miscarriage late-term too if I was to
Continue.

Even if this wasn't the case we have both agreed it's too soon and we aren't ready! I massively suffer with guilt and my mental health around this anyway and I know I'm
Making the right decision for me him
And my child but I cannot seem to shake this feeling or
Guilt. Even though I know I don't want to keep it. All this at Xmas !!
Hes fully on board with supporting but wants to tell his parents for support whose he's so close too and who adore children too and I've asked him
Not too however. As I have not told mine and I don't want any judgement x

No judgement here. You're making an informed choice, the meds and life situation sound hard. It's up to you who you tell and he should put you first with regards to telling his parents.
I think it's normal to feel guilty, have you spoken with your GP around the medication if that's something you're worried about and is influencing your choice? Would you feel differently if you'd not taken them?

Whatever you decide is your choice. Good to hear your partner is supportive.
Good luck op

No judgement; in my opinion you are making the right decision for your circumstances and it is an informed decision. However it is quite normal to have some misgivings and you and boyfriend haven't been together that long. You just have to weigh up the pros and cons and it seems you already have.

I do feel for you, it must be very difficult but you hadn't intended to have a child because you were on the pill.

When it is all over and you feel better - which you will - please discuss a more reliable form of contraception with your doctor.

All the very best.

I am in a similar position OP, in that I am going to terminate (also hate that word) but am having massive guilt about it.

It’s not the right time, in anyway for me to have another baby. But that doesn’t mean it’s easy. All I can hope is once it’s over, I don’t hate myself
Forever for it & understand it was the best thing for everyone all round.

Not easy though.. someone told me there is no ‘right’ decision with this. Just two wrongs...

👋🏼 hey

I had a termination 5 days ago. I won't lie - although it was not right, I am suffering with regret / guilt. I am not saying you will by any means but I wish someone had reached out to me and told me of these feelings before I had it.

Here if you want to chat - no judgment at all and happy to be open and honest x

@NinaJames hi Nina. What were your reasons for terminating if you don’t mind me asking? Do you think the regret/guilt will ease will time? Thank you for offering your experience to help x

@UsernameSpoosername ... happy to tell you but would feel more comfortable via private message.

As I've said, I'm not sure how I private message on here so if you send me one I can respond! X

Thanks @NinaJames I have Pm you x

I’m feeling it tonight too - not guilty as much, it’s the shame of it all and frustration. I feel like I’m searching the internet for things for ages which makes it worse, but can’t seem to stop. I just wake up with a sense of dread each morning at the moment, I feel really awful for my little girl as I’m just so not with it at the moment in terms of just not focused.