Dating scan - should I see/hear it or not?

[Pootiepie]

I’m undecided about what to do but have a dating scan tomorrow which is required if I do decide to terminate. I understand I have the choice whether to look/hear anything and I’m torn about whether or not do this. I realize if I see something or hear a heartbeat it might make it much harder to decide to terminate. But it feels like massive denial to ask to see/hear nothing when I’m still undecided.

Anyone else been in this position? What did you do re the scan and why? Any regrets?

How far gone do you think you are? If it's very early there's likely not much to see in terms of anything recognisable, but if you're nearer the 10-12 week mark then that might be different.

I think I would look. I don't think you'll hear anything though anyway unless it's later term.

You've got to make the right choice for you - it's so hard

Thanks @Foxd0g. I believe I’m about 7 weeks and I understand a heartbeat can be heard at this stage. And yes, it is hard

It can be, but they likely won't listen to it that early, although you will be able to see it almost pulsing/flashing on the screen.

Would you feel comfortable looking up 7-week scans online? Obviously don't if you may find it upsetting, but it might give you an idea what to expect.

Can I ask (and don't answer if you don't want to!) what makes you consider keeping/terminating the pregnancy?

Actually I have just been looking it up online to get an idea of what to expect tomorrow.

The reason I’m undecided is that I’m 43 and have never wanted kids. But although all my logic says to terminate, I’m discovering it’s not a straightforward decision.

I’m in a stable relationship, and other than age, there’s not really a ‘good’ reason not to. I know that we don’t need a reason and don’t need to justify ourselves but it’s feeling a bit uncomfortable for us to terminate without some ‘real’ reason. Lots of confusion!

Hi OP. Im a sonographer. At 7 weeks you're likely not to see much other than a bit of a blob and a flicker where the heartbeat is. Potentially you could be earlier as well depending on ovulation. We wouldn't normally listen to a heartbeat at this stage. Only a few of our machines have the equipment for it due to cost/resource management.

Good luck and and try to not stress too much. The decision you choose will be the right one for you :)

Thank you so much @BruceWilllis, this is reassuring and I appreciate your reply.

Can I ask, this might be a stupid question but do you have to have a dating scan before?

@needingadvice2 I’m not in the uk but where I am they have to do a blood test and dating scan (to determine that there is a viable pregnancy/the gestation age) before anything else. It’s so they know whether you are suitable for medical or surgical termination.