Hi all,
I’m looking for some opinions/advice on whether I am being unreasonable here. I have a 2yo and split from his father over a year ago. Ex and I have been mostly amicable (as long as he’s getting his own way) since a few months after the break up and we try to do things together as a family for our child. While this is nice, there are clearly still emotions involved which have sometimes blurred the lines between us. Long story short, I recently found myself pregnant again. I am incredibly embarrassed and ashamed of myself for letting this happen, but what’s done is done.
I have had a termination in the past and considered a termination with my existing child (which upsets me to think about). I have regrets from the previous termination and don’t think that I can go through that again. However, my ex insists that I get a termination and that it is detrimental to our existing child for me to go through with the pregnancy. He has told me that it will cause him (Ex) to have a breakdown and that he will be left homeless (And apparently I will be too according to him) if I continue.
This was not part of my plan and I am far from financially secure but I am in a better position than a lot of people (I do, however, rely on universal credit to top up my income and ex only contributes roughly £200/mo despite being fairly well off) and have very supportive family.
Last time I was pregnant I was mildly depressed but this time I feel so positive so I think hormones may be clouding my ability to think clearly and logically.
My existing child can be demanding and defiant but he absolutely loves being around other children and plays nicely/shares well despite not having much socialisation outside of softplay and the occasional playgroup.
Am I really being unfair on him by keeping this baby? I’m prepared to take on the added responsibility and do it alone even without ex contributing financially but I obviously don’t want my existing child to suffer.
Any advice/opinions welcome. Feel free to be as harsh as you like (I feel like I deserve it for getting myself into this mess).