abortion. In desperate need of your words. What shall I do?

[Helpme101]

I'm a 27 year old mother to a wonderful six year old. Life as a single mother hasn't been easy, but I managed. I always told myself I would only ever have another baby if I was married. Seems to me this isn't in my destiny. I'm 13 weeks pregnant . The father doesn't want to kn ow. He is 120 miles away and doesn't want to know the baby or myself.
Some days I wake up strong knowing I can do it but others I am deeply miserable and feel like I am horrible for thinking about abortion. I'm disappointed in myself I've left it this long. There have been times I've visualized the future with 2 kids. Other days I ask what an earth am I doing to myself. I'm very ill physically and mentally and emotionally and I don't know what to do. 2018 was meant to be about my career and I feel like I cannot succeed anymore. I am up against time. I don't know what I want to hear from you all. I'm just so confused.

Just saw your update op, and wanted to wish you all the very best. I really hope things work out for you. Congratulations.

Good luck OP. You seem to have come to a decision and you will know if it's the right one for you or not.

I've had two terminations, one medical and one surgical (don't trust fertility awareness as contraception ladies!), but I already knew that my family was complete.

If you have one child and think you want more and are single it's a completely different situation.

Even if you'll be a single mum to two kids. Yes that's hard, of course, but if you feel you family will be complete with two children then go for it. More than one kid is hard, and not just twice as hard as one. But having an only child when you wanted more is hard too.

It sounds like you are on your way to the right decision for your family.