Please help with your advice

[Nicole1503]

Hi guys, this is my first time posting on here I hope that I have posted in the right place.

A bit of background information - I am 23 years old, a nurse and currently live at home with my mum and siblings.

I have been seeing my boyfriend for almost 3 years and I am on the pill. I have recently found out that I am pregnant which was a huge shock to the both of us. Straight away he told me I should get an abortion. He already has one child with a previous partner which he doesnt see as she doesnt allow him to and he is currently going through the courts to try and get access. I felt it was important to mention this because this is one of the reasons he gives for wanting me to have an abortion, this and he says he is currently trying to better his life and by having this baby I would ruin that.

I agree that this is not the most ideal situation and if i could choose I would be settled in my own home living with the father of my child but unfortunaley that isn't the case.

I have expressed my feelings about keeping this baby to him and explained that in my heart I don't feel we have good enough reasons to abort it - I alone am in a financial position to have this baby and I know that my mother and siblings would also support me however he just keeps telling me how everything will change for the worst and his life will be ruined if I have this baby and I am torn.

I already love this little thing inside of me and to me - this is my baby but to him he sees it as nothing yet as im only 6 weeks. Ive cried everyday for the past week trying to decide what to do for the best.

I know I could bring this baby up alone but is it selfish of me to bring a child into the world knowing its father doesn't want it and chances are wont have anything to do for it. Also I dont want to ruin my boyfriends life but I dont want to get an abortion and live with regret for the rest of my life.

Please tell me your opinions and what you would do in my position. I feel like ive been backed into a corner and dont know where to turn to. Sorry for the long post and thank you for any help and replies.

It’s only natural to feel love towards your unborn child and he should feel blessed to have another shot at being a father as he currently is not able to see hes other child but as a man he doesn’t know how hard it will be to have an abortion but you should not go through with it if it’s not what you want to do it’s your body and it’s your baby. It’s great that you have support around you and hopefully your boyfriend comes around to the idea but so many women raise their children without a father or with somebody else so if abortion is something you will regret for the rest of your life then speak to a specialist or somebody close to you. You have several weeks to think about it I hope you come to the right decision for yourself.

Your body, your baby, your decision. If you feel that you're emotionally and financially ready then I think you'd really regret having a termination, particularly as you say you already love them.

Yes, it takes two to make a baby and ideally, this would be a joint decision but I think he's putting far too much pressure on you because of his personal situation. It's up to him to either support you if you decide to continue with the pregnancy or to walk away.

If you don’t want an abortion, don’t have it. I would however prepare for a fatherless child . I rarely believe a man when he says the ex won’t allow him access. My own father has said that he only didn’t see me for 6 weeks when I know and remember it being 6 months age 14.

Are you prepared to be a single mother?