Ever since then it's not gone away. I really wish I hadn't have gone through with it, because as they say: "You might regret an abortion but you'll never regret a baby".
I'm really sorry you're hurting, however I disagree with the above. I had a termination and I don't regret it, however if I had gone through with the pregnancy I'm almost 100% certain I would have regretted having a child.
I terminated just over 2 years ago and wasn't prepared for the feelings afterwards. I also grieved and I also felt a sense of 'loss' - it was horrible and I massively struggled. I think it was partially the pregnancy hormones and partially a massive sense of guilt - which I put on myself.
I genuinely, genuinely believe if I had continued with the pregnancy I would have committed suicide. If I had somehow managed to cope on anti depressants and had a child, I am almost certain I would have had horrific post natal depression and my life would have been very different - not in a positive way.
There is a light at the end of the tunnel, but it takes time - and you need to be kind to yourself. I was lucky enough to 'meet' a lovely lady off Mumsnet who also terminated a pregnancy and everything she told me helped, even though it didn't feel like it at the time. She told me that 'time heals' - For me, that's so true, but you might not believe it at the moment.
She also told me that she wasn't prepared for the 'mental' aspect afterwards and felt very low, but now she can look back and see she wasn't 'herself' and doesn't think she made the wrong decision. I am the same - I focused on the physical 'getting better' and didn't put much though into my mental state, whereas I recovered physically very easily, but it took me MONTHS to feel 'OK' with my decision.
I hope you feel better soon - Please try and be kind to yourself, sometimes we can be our own worst enemy