I'm 10 weeks and haven't done anything :(

[justdontknow1]

As the title says I'm now 10 weeks pregnant and still don't know what to do :(

DP is not the father to my eldest DC and currently works away 95% of the time so hardly seeing him ATM.

I just don't know if I can go through with another baby. It's so hard when I'm by myself. And my exdp, who is my dc's father, will be devastated about this. He's never given up hope of us reconciling and I'm honestly terrified he's going to react terribly.

DP wants to keep the baby but says I can do what I want. I don't know and I don't know how I'll ever make a decision.

I feel scared that if I keep the baby I'm passed the right time for a booking in appointment and the midwife will report me for not seeking appropriate antenatal care.

I also feel like if I decide to have an abortion I'll be waiting weeks for an appointment. I'm scared of the complications of a surgical procedure and I know a medical procedure is agony.

I feel like I'm losing my mind

You sound very brave. It sounds like you're struggling alone and you shouldn't be, how were things with dp before you found it? I don't understand why he would be annoyed that you told your ex?
I hope you make your decision with your happiness in mind and nobody else's.
From your writing it sounds like you've had to look after people for a long time, look after yourself now