More than just a 'walking bump'

[clairejs]

Just a moan really, but i used to love my ever expanding waistline and the 'ooooh's' and 'ahhhhs' that came with the topic of pregnancy. But recently, with just mere weeks left, feeling a tad like a wading hippo, im now sick of the 'ooogling' stares as I waddle and guide my mahoosive bump in and out the queues and crowds.

My partner has also noticed the increased stares and looks and glances with open mouths and not so silent mutterings but takes it as a humourous joke and with sheer delight. ME on the other hand feel like a walking 'bump' as if a sight had never been seen before. I even had one women who looked me up and down shook her head from side to side and tutted in my face! I couldn't control myself when i turned to her and pointed to my wedding finger as a gesture and shouted 'yeah and?!'

'sigh' please don't say its just me?? xx

Its not just you. Im 36 weeks now and people are just openly staring at me in the street, some with their jaw gaping open... It happened last time too.

There is no answer, once the baby arrives they will all be staring at him/her instead and you will be invisible again.

it is not just you.

I was telling dh the other day how the checkout ladies in Waitrose were all guessing how long I had to go - one said I must be a week over at least, 'oh no, she's got 3 weeks to go!' 'my goodness, you're enormous...' etc etc.

As you say, people's jaws drop when they walk past me, and others look at me with pity as I waddle after my 3 and 4 year old, who have cottoned on to the fact that I can't chase them!

TBH I am too weary to care much

Yep, I'm 31 weeks and people stare at me wherever I go, I even had a mediterranean man spit at me in Leicester city centre and give me a look of total disgust. I was wearing a maternity maxi dress with a vest underneath so no cleavage. The only part of my body that was visible was my arms and neck, which I guess he must have found offensive!

Obviously that was quite extreme, but yes the staring is starting to p*ss me off now!

I am 28 weeks with 3rd baby and share an office with at least two other women carrying 1st babies. I am twice their size and get loads of comments about it - yes it's annoying!!! Yesterday I got asked if I was on MAT leave already!!

Im fed up off this too, Im 34 weeks with dc4 and have got massive bump which get pointed at a lot (to be fair I had a scan this week and dc already weighs in at 7lb so I know its another mini elephant baby) Plus my other DC are 5, 4 and 2 so I get asked if they are all mine no obviously Im a limping (spd) waddling childminder.
I was at a wedding last weekend with 3 other women all due within a week or 2 of me and I kept getting the comments but your sooo much bigger, yes moron this is baby no 4 the others have all been 10 lb'rs I was ready to cry until by lovely FIL said (loudly) that I didnt look pregnant from the back and at least my belly was due to being pregnant- this was pointedly aimed at the larger lady who had been making me feel like crap all day.

Rant over

vix206 - I really cannot believe that how didnt you punch him in the face. Im angry for you.

Not just you. 35+5 with dc3 here and fed up with the up and down staring going on. was massive with dc1, not so with dc2 but am huge again this time, also have spd and use a crutch so that draws attention too. it sucks and roll on the next 4 weeks I say.

oh and claire I was in tesco a few weeks ago(on my own without dp or the children) and this old bag walked up to me, tutted, said "disgusting" and walked off, I was so shocked I couldnt actually say anything back. im 25 and dont look overly old but ive got a car, 2 jobs, a partner etc etc how dare she!

I've been getting fed up with this too. Of course, I'm only 23, so of course it's utterly filthy that I'm 36 weeks pregnant and thin with it all 'out the front' like a giant rugby ball, but some of the looks people give you are quite demoralising.

Particularly when all you can manage is a gentle waddle because the braxton hicks kick in just as the PGP/SPD/whatever you want to call it flares up. My fingers are just puffy enough that I've had to take my engagement ring off too, so I bet all the judgey types are laying bets on how much I scrounge on my luxury flat and lavish lifestyle. . It makes me feel unspeakably guilty for being unemployed and needing DP home with me as my carer, I can tell you that. (Though at least I can take refuge walking closely beside him as he pushes our DS along.)

I really can't wait to get this lovely baby out of me.

Companiable hugs to fellow sneered-at mums-to-be though. We'll get through this!

OMG!!! I am completely especially at the spitting story!!

Yeah to be honest I was totally shocked and actually a bit frightened because the look of hatred on his face was a real 'if looks could kill' thing... I genuinely thought he might attack me so I just walked on as fast as I could.

I'm 32 so not too young and not too old... consensus seems to be (from friends) that it was the bare arms that offended him. He was definitely from overseas (I heard them talking) as I walked by the group of them and apparently some cultures/religions can be quite iffy about women on their own showing too much arm... I don't much care for people spitting at me

I hate that up and down staring thing, I mean come on people - we all came from the same place and its hardly new!! Makes me mad...

I can't believe just how judgmental some ignorant people can be! im totally shocked! If it wasn't difficult enough just trying to get housework/shopping/walking/looking after kids etc we get a select few 'looks'. Its now to a point where, I try my best not to leave the house if i know i'm going to be on my own.

Im not mahoosive like some pregnant friends i know, yes i waddle, yes clothes are ill-fitting (although i do avoid tight fitting tops and belly hanging out etc) but i never remember staring at pregnant women before i fell pregnant myself. I just wonder what they could possibly be thinking as i always assume the worst :S soo glad (right word?) that im not alone xx

what the hell is going on?? why are preg women being tutted/spat at by complete strangers? this is madness!! i can't believe that spitting story - i dont care where you hail from, spitting is gross in any culture, and intimidating a pregnant woman for showing arm during a fucking heatwave is just bang out of order.
and what the hell was that old lady in the supermarket tutting and saying 'disgusting' for? i assume you werent chuffing a fag or dishing out beer to your dc's, so whats her beef?? god people make me so cross sometimes.

im almost 39 weeks and desperately uncomfortable and irritable by the way, so if you need any spitting tutting passers-by murdered i'll gladly oblige.

Had similiar experience when shopping with my Mum this week, I'm a week overdue so HUGE, but from the looks people were giving me I should have been in 'confinement' sat waiting docilely at home. (not a chance, DS1 was at nursery and I needed some 'me time')

Also some complete twat decided to follow me down the street mimicking my waddle.
alannabanana: I'm with you.. I could have walloped him!

That's so weird; maybe I'm just oblivious to staring (I tend to go round with a vague smile on my face and zone out short-sightedly). Or maybe it's just that there seems to be a baby boom going on in my town. If someone was out-and-out rude to me though, I would be rude right back; how DARE they! on all your behalfs!

Where do you all live???!!!

Never had that sort of reaction and i'm all bump out front. I presume you're pregnancy hormones must be low as well cos they would all have been walking away with their ears bleeding if they'd done that to me! I'm not normally confrontational at all, but i'm a bitch when annoyed at the minute. My whole family have taken the attitude of - let her do/have whatever she wants.

Tell them to feck off.

I live in Leicester but go around the UK a lot and have so far found people stare wherever I go. Its not always in a horrible way, sometimes they just seem kind of interested in looking. I don't know... but the spitting incident happened in a more upmarket part of Leicester!! I think he was just an extremely rude and disgusting man, it was quite extreme. If he hadn't looked so intimidating (and if I hadn't been alone) I would have done more than glare back at him!

I think some people just dont have anything better to do.

I'm 25 weeks tomorrow and people have been asking me since 15 weeks not long to go now and when I tell them how far gone I am you can really see the shock on there face. Some people even comment and say how huge I am, totally sick of the stares everywhere I go!

Gosh can't believe that people are so rude! I'm 35 weeks and a teacher - have tired slightly of 'Are you pregnant?' (no I've eaten ALL the pies) 'What are you having?' (a baby) 'How long till you pop' (too long - if only we did 'pop' sounds quite quick and painless)

Anyway I was in New York a few weeks ago and it was so nice - I got congratulated more times in those 2 days than the entire rest of the pregancy - people smiled at me, I got my own lift going up Empire State because I 'needed the room' it was so nice having people so pleased for you. We have ishoos in this country.

I am 38 wks, and all up front, but have been very low for the past two weeks.
I must admit, I am getting tired of the 'you mustn't have long left' comments.
I hear comments from strangers all the time when walking past, or behind me.
If they have to comment, why not do it quietly?
I'd never dream of stareing and saying it out loud !!
I went on my own to a car boot sale this morning with my 18 month old.
I felt like a pop star! Every one was stareing. I felt really paranoid and uncomfortable at first.
But then I though 'sod ya' ! So I went back around and gave everyone a big smile that even glanced at me!.
They soon looked away ! LOL.
Then again, I do find myself secretly glancing at other pregnant women, and guessing how far they are

wonderstuff That's interesting that you say that, cos I live in New York and people are unbelievably nice to me (34wks and not small!) - people asking "how're you feeling?" and saying things like "how exciting for you!" and "stay healthy!" - and offering seats on my commute (subway + bus). I was reading this thread with absolute horror - do you think it's a British ishoos thing, are they all disgusted that we've all be shagging or something?!

I was walking along the street at about 36 weeks and saw a 60-odd year old man stumble out of the Ship Inn and start walking towards me. He looked at my bump then his face lit up and he gave me this delighted grin while proudly patting his own (beer) bump! I laughed all the way home and it still makes me grin to myself now!

I agree, blackcurrants, that it is partly a British thing, because it's the equivalent of walking around with an "I've had sex!" sign stuck to your forehead!

Last pg I was waiting on a crowded tube platform and a girl behind me said to her friend "I just don't see why pregnant women have to get on the tube". Errr, to get to work same as everybody else?!

Some awful stories here! It does seem like the 'expected' size of a pregnant woman is how big you are at about 6 months - the size of all the maternity wear models, etc - and once you get past this point you start to get the comments and looks, as if you're not supposed to leave the house for the last 3 months.

Sad thing is, I think the same - bloody hell, you're enormous! - whenever I catch myself in the mirror! (37 weeks here)