Desperate for advice...

[upsetmummytobe]

I've changed my name because i'm so embarrassed and ashamed at what I've got to say.

I'm 27 weeks pregnant and I just feel like I can't carry on with it. I've always hated being pregnant since the very day after I found out as it was then I started being sick. I was quite bad with morning sickness, not to the extremes of hyperemesis but according to the doctor I wasn't far off.
At the moment, DP and I haven't seen each other for nearly 2 weeks as we don't live together (but are hoping to soon) and I miss him like mad.
I don't feel like myself. I hate what I am like now. I feel empty. I can't go out by myself, I really struggle to get out of the house on my own.
I cry all the time. I get upset at every tiny thing and I know that's relatively normal in pregnancy but it doesn't feel right. I'm convinced that every time I cry or get upset I'm harming my baby, and that she'd be better off coming now because she'd be safer.

I'm desperate for advice. I haven't told DP how I feel and I really don't think I could talk to a midwife or doctor. I need to know what i can do to make myself feel better. Please help.

You poor thing - that's a dreadful way to be feeling and it's NOT YOUR FAULT.

Pregnancy can make the best of us fall to peices but it does sound like you are depressed and need some help. Please don't think of this as anything to be ashamed of. You really do need to talk to someone professional though, though there is less to offer medically in pregnancy there is councelling and other alternatives. Please go and talk to your GP - it'll be difficult but book a double appointment and just show them what you've written here.

Lots of cyber hugs and hope you manage to get some help soon xx

That is very sad that you feel like this - you really do need to tell your midwife/doctor so that they can put you in touch with the right person to talk to, a counsellor or someone. Also, you might need some treatment, pregnancy can cause all sorts of hormonal imbalances, and perhaps this isn't helping. Sorry, I don't have much advice, but it sounds like you need some professional help.

I am so sorry you feel like this its sounds like a difficult pregnancy, hormones and your situation is making things hard to cope with. I agree with the above messages you shold get help from the GP or Midwife as you could have post natal depression. Don't be ashamed your body and life is changing significantly at the momement and everyone handles it differently.
I have a history of depression and have been put on high risk for my pregnancy so the doctors and midwifes are watching me constantly for how I will cope with the changes and hormones. You should get help for the sake of you and your baby. By sharing this you have already been very brave and you should be proud of that and although it will be difficult speaking to someone.

My thoughts are with you and like MagnumIceCreamAddict I'm sending you lots of virtual hugs x x x

Sorry obviously not post natal depression but depression none the less, you may just be having a tough time and need some support either way get help.
Lots of love x x x

I second what others have said above, especially about writing stuff down and taking it to show the doctor if you think it will be too difficult to talk about.

I also think you should talk to your DP.

Please don't feel embarrassed or ashamed.

x

I agree with what all the others say, sounds like you are having a tough time and all the hormonal changes can really make you change your perspective.

please speak to your dp and midwife/doctor, they will be able to help you - you shouldnt tackle this alone.

take care x

I was reading something a while back about antenatal depression and actually how common it is but how little is written about.

Not surprising really - you have physical symptoms (hormones, sickeness, tiredness, weight gain), you have a massive change in life coming, you don't see your partner enough for the support he can give you and if you're like me, you don't feel in control at all as your body keeps doing things you have no influence over.

So not surprising you're struggling to cope - there is a lot to cope with! Talk to someone - a friend, your DP, or better still your midwife. They WILL be non-judgemental and they WILL understand.

And, you are not harming your baby so please don't worry about that.

Ah hun, don't feel embarrassed or ashamed. Absolutely nothing wrong with being human and finding prenancy a struggle.
I'm 35wks and have felt pretty rubbish most of the time. There were even times early on that I considered abortion because I just didn't think I could carry on any more. Our baby was planned and very much wanted, but it just goes to show how desperate not feeling like you're coping can make you feel.

Must be hard not having your DP around to give you a hug when you need it.

Your baby is lucky that you care enough about it to worry that you're doing it harm, but I'm sure you're not. Think of all those pregnant women you see that blatantly think more about having a good time than their unborn child (drink/smake/drugs etc.)

Please try to talk to someone about how you feel, if only so you know that its okay to feel anxious and a little scared.

I had antenatal depression it was hideous please go see your gp and ask for a referral asap.