First baby how much does it all cost????

[dyzzidi]

I am getting quite stressed with DP at the moment about how much we will need to spend on Baby things. My stressing is not about the cost more about the fact my idiot DP has no idea of what we will need and when I tell him i get met with a blank expression.

I took him to mothercare this weekend pointed at many things we will need and estimated at about £1000.

I got met with remarks like cot/mosesbasket/pram blankets and sheets don't we have enough sheets already. I replied Yes dear of course we do for our king size bed do you suggest getting the scissors out???

The man is completely bizarre he complains at sheet but then comes home with trainers for the unborn child.

Is anybody else experiencing this or is it only me marrying an idiot!!

Just wanted to second that you really need far less than you think at first. Get the very basics and then see how it goes. DS had so many things that he didn't play with, wear, pay any attention to whatsoever, etc. It's just so easy as a first-time mum to think that you need everything. Give him love, milk, clean nappies, and a warm bed. Everything else will sort itself out in time.

you pay what you want to pay, almost. There are NCT nearly new sales everywhere - just look up National Childbirth Turst on the net. If you also go to their classes you will also acquire companions, sometimes for life There are also charity shops - quite often have ex hotel good quality white sheets that can be cut up for baby sheets. If you buy new get plain white to be cut up later for navity play costumes, dye them if they are a shepherd

There are excellent boot sales near us and at the kids school fetes I bought some lovely childrens toys in great condition for between 20p and 50p each.

OTOH if you think your baby must have everything new because he spends a fortune on watches then spend your £1000.

I think I am getting more bothered by the fact he thinks fairys will bring all the stuff we need for this baby with him making no effort at all.

I am going to wait until November before i buy anything as I may be able to get my hands on second hand stuff in the meantime to save money.

I think if we save up a lot of money to buy the stuff and we don't spend it then fantastic we may even be able to fit in a last minute weekend break with the money saved.

I found a lot of stuff was cheaper at kiddicare, there is a link to them on this site. Ordered on line and was delivered promptly. We could both sit at the pc and compare the prices on line for kiddicare, mothercare,mamas and papas etc. The mothercare catalogue has a list of what they consider to be the basics on the back but ultimatley if he is being daft just take his credit card and get what you need. Everyone was really generous when we had dd and we were given loads of stuff, i kept it all in the loft thank god as we will be needing it all in 4 weeks time!!!!!

I don't think you are alone with a DP/DH who has not got a clue about what a baby really needs and the cost. My dh was like others here and questioned virtually everything at first. But then I sat him down and showed him a list of basic items and also insisted that as it would be our first child I would want to buy a few lovely things as well.
To be honest I would only by a few bit of clothes as we were given loads and loads , especially as it was my parents 1st grandchild.

Kiddicare are brill, I would always check there before buying anything.
We also found that babies r us in the Toys R Us stores were good. We got dd a lovely beech cot there and her moses basket was very reasonable there, sorry cannot remember prices.

With regards you comment about buying trainers, my dh used to come home with loads of litte hats all the time as he just loved babies hats!!!

RedZuleika I had the baby gym and tiny love mobile (got given the former, bought the latter) for his arrival! Quite agree that things to stimulate them is a good thing - I know you know my point though - pare it down to the bare essentials first and then add the trimmings!

Dyzzidi - it is so frustrating, isn't it. Problem is, he sounds like so many men. Mine for example - in the not too distant future, my baby will be either crawling or walking and the whole house is full of his unsuitable stuff - will he do anything about it before the baby becomes mobile? Apparently not. We have to wait for him to crack his head 15 times, cut it open at least once, break a guitar and pull a motorbike down on top of himself. I feel like screaming sometimes, so I really sympathise.

Actually, it would be good if the faries did pull their finger out and get stuff sorted!

Would definitely recommend nct nearly new sales and ebay - nice to buy some things new, but not everything. Also, if people ask what presents you would like (we had a baby shower for dd and my friends worked off a list I had put together for me to shop with!), suggest they gave you vouchers for stores you like, like Mothercare. I managed to stretch out dd's vouchers to buy her first shoes and her 2nd stage carseat, and as I was still off work, that was a big help.

I certainly havent spent much on my first ds.

Cot was given to us from SIL(bought mattress)
Pram was £45 new from a shop where I know manager!
Most of the essential clothes came from my sister(she has 1ds and 1dd)
Moses basket and stand was from a friend
Blankets were from a friend
Motherease nappies from ebay

OH yes, and I made my cot sheets from double sheets- purely because I believe they are so overpriced!
At the moment the cot has single sheet on it!(It is a cot bed though)

I have bought some things new such as cute outfits, shoes,baby bath, changing mat.

How is the baby going to know where things come from??

I think I must be in minority...I went around cringeing at prices whereas DH thought it was good value (£500 for a pram...sorry 'travel system'!! !!)

I think that's only because he is a farmer though and sees it in terms of baby 'machinery'...

I agree teuch, I often cringed at the prices, I dont see £500 for pram as good value! I can also think of better things to spend money on!

I kept trying to twll my dp that the babies wouldn't cost too much. i've just worked out though we have spent around £3k on the twins so far, maybe more. They are four months old. Plus we had to change the car.

car - £11,000
buggy - £530
buggy II - £80
cots - £280
matresses - £70
highchairs - £260
sheets - £100
bottles, sterilisng etc. - £110
toys - £170
clothes - £500
etc..

it is scary looking at it written down!

RZ, a baby gym is fabulous. You can bung the baby under it and feel all competently stimulating, for, oooh, months. DD1 lolled around under hers for the best part of a year, I think.

my top tip is not to buy a moses basket but to get a pram that has a carrycot. ours has been used for 3 kids now and is still in reall nice condition(no frayed wickery stuff) they sleep in it comfortably and they go out in the pram in it too, and be lying flat comfortably.

and people like to buy presents. my mum and dad bought our cot, dhs parents bought the pram, my sister bought the car seat, my brother bought the monitor, my sil bought a changing bag etc.babies bring out the generosity in people!

I've managed to skip the moses basket and the boucny chairs. Just used carseats and big cots. Did have a bit of fun with the big cots, and babies went to sleep in the laundry baskets for the first couple of weeks
Gyms are great, the cheaper the better - all mine have prefered plastic ones to expensive fabric ones. If you are going to spend money on toys, wait and get an activity center, they are pricey, but babies love beign upright, and it provides hours of freedom.
Also, never buy 3/2in1 stuff - it never works as well. I've found it with everythign, toys, highchairs, prams - I always wished I had goen for more basic stuff.

motherinferior: I'm not sure whether you genuinely think they're a good idea, or whether you're being facetious... Obviously I realise it won't last until they're doing their A-levels - or if it does, it'll be the least of my worries.

Was also temporarily confused by your suggesting putting the baby UNDER the mat (out of sight, out of mind - now where did I put that gin...??), but now realise you meant (hopefully) under the bar things, on top of the mat...

Cutting up sheets - and a waffle bedspread - is exactly what I did -it is much cheaper than buying baby sheets and easy to do!

If you buy stuff second hand you can normally sell it on for the same as it cost later on!!!

This doesn't work as well with push chairs though as they are really fashion-led. So you could get a 2nd hand one OK but don't bank on being able to sell it on. Ebay/car boot sales are good places to buy, or look in your local paper.

You always get loads of clothes as presents so don't go mad buying them new - a few 2nd hand vests/sleepsuits from a boot sale would do!

Then use all the saved cash on babysitting/holiday/treats for yourself!

i found lots of people bought newborn clothes as a present so i would already buy some things in 3-6 and 6-12 months as you will need them anyway. plus you don't know how big/small your baby will be and might need them sooner than you think!

Well that rather depends how you choose to read it, doesn't it? And whether you choose to differentiate between facetiousness and jest.

What's your point?

We're first-timers (Bab due in 6-8 weeks ), and thanks to the wonder that is the internet, we've saved loads of money. Our pram was £140 from ebay (down from £450!), and everything right down to baby bedding and cloth nappies has been bought cheaper than list price from various sale sites (i too would thoroughly recommend Kiddicare.com) which means we've got some spare cash for when Baby's actually here. It's definitely worth shopping around. We used Mothercare for inspiration then hunted round to get it all cheaper.

We've got one of those baby gym mats too - they come highly recommended from my best friend who had her first baby in April. So cute, with a Winnie the Pooh theme (as is most of my stuff!) and things hanging down to aid Bab's development, all for the bargain price of £19 in the Argos sale

I think DP is playing with it at the mo! His excuse - practicing for when the baby comes .
I'm sure we've probably got stuff we won't ever need, but it's our first baby and our argument is that we've saved so much on the basics that we can afford to indulge. I'm getting so excited now, i'll be glad when He's finally here so we can play with all our bits!