Help wanted!

[Sophrosyne1]

Hi All,

I have posted a similar thread in December babies but was hoping to get a wider audience here...

I'm 7(ish?) weeks pregnant and I'm off work today, I have had horrible nausea for days and am finding work really difficult. I work part-time in an inner city primary school and teach PPA lessons across Years 3 and 4, behaviour is on a horrendous downward spiral and there seem to be more and more violent incidents. I usually feel strong enough to deal with these but with my hormones all over the place I don't feel up to it. I also feel very vulnerable, I have miscarried in the past and don't want to end up in a situation I can't handle. Last week I had to restrain a Year 4 girl who was trying to knock seven bells out of some of her class mates, I waded in before thinking about whether it was safe for me, in fact, I forgot I was pregnant until I was able to hand this girl over to someone else! No one at school knows that I'm pregnant and I'm wondering if I ought to let them know (I've told them I have a migraine today).

It's still really early days, but I have a scan on Friday because I had quite a lot of pain 2 weeks ago and it was all located on one side. A scan then showed that everything was in the right place (not ectopic) but it was too soon to see anything other than the sac and yolk sac, they booked me a follow up scan to check that the baby is developing.
I feel anxious about the appointment because when I miscarried there was no bleeding, it was detected through a scan. As Friday gets closer I'm feeling more and more worried so, as you can imagine, combined with my school situation and morning sickness I'm not really up to the job right now. I guess what I'm asking is if I should just come clean and explain that this is why I'm not in. I don't envisage that I will feel any better until the scan (although that would only mean missing one more day of work as I don't work on Thursdays or Fridays anyway). I know I'm being a bit of a wimp but I just feel awful.

My partner thinks I'm being silly but he's not a teacher and I was with someone else when I miscarried. My partner and I have a lovely 21 month old and even though I had a lot of problems with bleeds during my pregnancy with her, the fact that ultimately everything worked out means that my partner only has experience of everything working out... I know what it feels like when it doesn't...

Sorry to be waffling, just blame the hormones (I guess that's a good sign!).

Thanks in advance for any help.

Soph x

i think if it was me i would skive off work for the rest of the week (only tomorrow if i get your working pattern right) have the scan on fri and if all is well then tell them on Monday or at least tell the colleagues/headteacher that matter/can help. if you don't i think you end up more stressed coz you're trying to keep a secret as well as feeling rubbish and not up to the job. At the end of the day you have to look after yourself and your baby first. You're not being silly or a whimp at all. I had to tell my boss before i wanted too as i was too rough to work but i did make it clear that it was my business and i didn't want it broadcast in any circumstances. Being pregnant is really hard, specially when you are sick and struggling at work so go easy on yourself
(rambling but hope it helps)

I agree, tell them after the scan. What I would say is your baby is a lot less vulnerable that you think and whilst you should avoid brawling children (year 4 ) your baby is well protected in there. But I think it would be wise to tell someone so you are not put in that situation again.

Also you're not being silly at all. We are all suffering from extra hormones and I'm normally pretty placid but I'm so crabby at the moment - my poor husband!

Being sick is horrible too (but a good sign all is going well - or so they say!). My first time I had it real bad but managed to hide behind a computer for 12 weeks and coast along. SOunds like nowhere for you to hide. Don't be too hard on yourself and the best of luck for the scan.