Do I have reason enough to request an elective caesarean? Possible TMI and very long

[cornballer]

Hello,
I've been a bit of a lurker on here but I've come to a point where I really need some advice - this may be a long post, sorry!

I haven't had the most straightforward pregnancy and at 36+3 now I feel that I really need an ELCS.

I've tried to talk to my consultant about it twice but I feel she doesn't take me seriously and won't even allow a conversation about it - she talks over me without letting me explain my worries. I've asked my midwife and she just says I have to talk to my consultant. I'm now thinking the only way is to write a letter but first I was hoping some of you ladies could take a look at my reasons and tell me whether I'm wasting my time or whether I'm justified in wanting an ELCS.

Firstly, it isn't because I've suddenly decided I'm 'too posh to push', I am genuinely petrified about my baby's safety.

Here are my reasons...

Reason 1)
For about 10 years I've had thick odourless green discharge (sorry, TMI) and vaginal pain which - despite numerous different tests over the years (by different GP's, different STD clinics and two different hospitals) - they can't find a cause for. All the tests always come back negative. I've been treated with a broad range of very strong antibiotics three times just in case but they haven't made a blind bit of difference. I was told I just need to accept they can't find anything wrong and that this could just be 'normal for me'.

For the past couple of years I've just accepted it as 'normal', but now with the imminent arrival of my first baby I have started to worry about it. I am having nightmares every night about him being covered in this green stuff in the birth canal and it making him ill and then killing him.

I've tried to look into it and all I can find is that green discharge = bad and NOT normal at all.

I am well aware that they can't test for everything. I'm petrified that it is either something rare that tests don't exist for, something that is resistant to antibiotics, or something viral or parasitic (which I have read can still cause discharge). I am petrified that my baby is all safe in his amniotic sac, then when it comes to the birth, he will be exposed to this horrible stuff and it will kill him. We had a next door neighbour who's baby died last year after getting meningitis and then getting herpes straight after due to undiagnosed infections that she passed onto the baby during birth.

Reason 2)
I am extremely worried that my psychological state about this (and I am so worried I can barely think of anything else, it's making me feel utterly ill) will somehow stall the labour as I SO don't want my baby anywhere near the birth canal.

Reason 3)
The baby has enlarged ventricles in his brain which they found at the 20 week scan, so we've had lots of monitoring and tests etc. I don't know how much the plates of his skull can overlap but seeing as fluid can't be compressed surely there comes a point where the only thing that can be compressed is brain tissue. Wouldn't this be quite bad? I'm concerned that if I have so much fear of baby being in the birth canal that my body won't push him out, he is going to end up with his head getting squashed for too long and get damaged. Plus wouldn't forceps and ventouse be more dangerous in this situation?

Reason 4)

They have told me I have Group B Strep. This has got nothing to do with the green discharge I'm concerned about above as Group B Strep doesn't cause symptoms. I guess if the discharge was being caused by Group B Strep they would have told me years ago.
My worries about this are that I will not be able to have many internal examinations, I won't be able to have my waters broken if needed or any sweeps etc. I also won't be able to have that monitoring clip on the baby's head. I'm terrified of the baby being in distress because I'm too scared to push him through the birth canal and no one knowing.

Reason 5)
My blood pressure is high - around 144/92, my resting pulse is 90bpm and I have put on 4 and a half stone during the pregnancy. I'm worried that my heart wouldn't cope with even a relaxed happy labour never mind one where I'm petrified of baby getting an infection.

Reason 6)
My SPD is almost excruciating now, I'm having physiotherapy but it isn't helping. I don't know how I'm going to get my legs wide enough to let baby out.

Reason 7)
I'm experiencing incontinence already despite having been doing pelvic floor excercises every day through the pregnancy. The midwife has said it will only get worse after the birth. A collegue who had incontinence too prior to birth is now having an operation to repair her entire pelvic floor and she says she wishes she'd told her consultant and had an ELCS.

Reason 8)
The baby is breech, though they reckon he might still turn around.

I know I'm not an expert with any of this and I know people have far worse stuff than this that make them want an ELCS but I so desperately want the safe delivery of my baby, an elective is the only way I can see him having a good chance of being safe. I am petrified for his safety and I just need someone to listen.

If anyone has got to the end of this, thank you for reading my worries - do you think the consultant will just laugh at me and say no don't be so stupid? Do I have valid concerns? I guess at the very least I want to put it in writing so it is on my file that I have asked and then if anything does go wrong it won't be like I didn't try. I am so scared and time is really running out.

tethersend I totally agree with you! I am as surprised as everyone else that she hasn't already been offered one.

I've worked on many many maternity wards and been present at many many births and I've never known anyone be forced into delivering a breech baby naturally when they didnt want to.
cornballer doesn't need to give any other reason apart from the fact that the baby is breech! and as others have said you absolutely do not have to agree to a ECV, all the ones I have ever witnessed have popped right back anyway!
Once again, good luck!

Cornballer don't worry about having a C Section at all - for every person who tells you it was a nightmare recovering from it there will be another 2 or more like me who will have had no problems with it at all. Eeryone's experience is different.

It was great and I would have another one tomorrow without any shadow of doubt or moments hesitation.

P.S Best of luck with your GP appointment too.

There isnt anything more I can add really, but just wanted to wish you luck with your GP. I really hope for you and baby that ur GP listens to you and talks with you and not at you. Sounds like your consultant needs to course in people skills.

Good Luck !

Everyone has given you lots of useful advice so the only thing I would add is that with DC2, I had to insist that I wanted a c-section. My consultant was not impressed and was quite forceful in his suggestion that I could have a vaginal birth.

I just went along with things with my first DC and ended up with an emergency c-section that took weeks to recover from. With my second section (the elective one), I recovered very quickly and had very little pain. The whole experience was a million miles away from the first.

Ask for a second opinion.

My sister had two elective C Sections and she said that both were really nice experiences. All the staff were friendly and happy and she felt the same too (albeit a little nervous). It was relaxed, nice pain free way to have a baby. Not like having a emergency one where you are scared simply because of the "emergency" element of the situation.

Hopefully it can be a nice experience for you too - rather than having to have your labour and birth fraught with worry, fear and pain!

You have extremely good reasons for an elcs. As others have said, take a written copy of your post - perhaps a couple so you can give one to the GP. Get another consultant immediately - you're too far on to be messed about by someone who isn't taking your fears seriously.

I am having an elcs with #2 in June after a lot of bladder problems due to DC1's emergency forceps. I've read up on risks and it is a big thing to request surgery but I had an agreement in writing before I even got pregnant with DC2. I have reviewed my choice for months but my gut says elcs is my best option for my and baby's safety and longterm health.

Your gut feeling should not be dismissed. If anything negative were to happen it would be horrific to deal with trauma knowing you tried to prevent it and were not listened to.

Hello,

Just a quick update. Have spoken to numerous people at the hospital over the last week and I think I'm really annoying them.

Baby remains breech but they won't book me in for an ELCS until I get to 39 weeks, they want to wait for him to turn. They've all said that him remaining breech is the only reason they'd give me an ELCS.

As for all the other things I'm worrying myself sick about, they say none of the things would justify an ELCS. I showed them exactly what I'd typed out here that I told you guys. They say I have no right to an ELCS. I had a full scale breakdown in front of one of the consultants after she was really quite nasty about it.

If baby does turn around and I do have to have a normal delivery I'm just going to have to hope for the best. Thank you so much for all your support everyone xx

Put a complaint in about the consultant. Nobody should get away with that kind of behavoiur.

I would normally never say this but: hope LO stays in that position so you can have the ELCS, but if he/she doesnt I really hope it goes as smoothly as possible x

What are the doing re your BP?

Your consultant sounds awful, my heart goes out to you. It's hard enough dealing with everything that being pregnant throws at you without having to deal with rude drs.

I had an ELCS 17 weeks ago. Luckily for me I had an understanding and helpful consultant. I had a 3rd degree tear with 1st baby and was worried about it happening again with my 2nd. They offered me elective episiotomy (also had this with 1st) but did say that due to how I tore last time it could happen again! I asked about ELCS and they agreed.

All situations are different and they should at least listen to your worries before dismissing them.

Good luck with the rest of your pregnancy and hope you get what is best for you and your baby xxx

Thank you

I'm hoping it's just because she was just having a bad day, it was horrible though and really threw me. I think she thinks I'm worrying for no reason, she mentioned that she has dealt with women who have had genital mutilation who don;'t make a fuss.

They don't seem to think anything needs doing about my bp right now which puzzles me a bit, they just said to call them if I get any severe headaches, start seeing flashing lights or get a crippling pain at the top of my bump. My bp was 157/101 at my last appointment and I had +1 protein but the consultant didn't even mention it. I just have to trust they know what they are doing and stop worrying about it somehow. If they were worried they would have said something I'm sure. Plus they said if my bp is high when I go into labour someone will check it every 15 mins which is reassuring I guess.

I just can't shake the worry of all the other stuff though, this crippling 24 hour fear that I'm going to end up with a dead baby. I've never been in this much turmoil in my life!!

I keep trying figure out whether I'm worrying unneccesarily like the medical staff seem to think but I just feel in my bones that something is wrong. Green stuff and pain isn't right I just know it!! Just because they haven't diagnosed it doesn't mean it should be totally disregarded.

What kind of mother am I already if I can't stand up for what I believe is best for the poor little bairn before he's even born

I am going to call the nice midwife at the hospital at the end of the week when she is back from holiday and see if she can suggest someone else I can speak to. I don't want to just leave it and hope the baby stays breech.

Cornballer - I really think that you need to see somebody to discuss your anxiety.

cornballer, I feel so sorry for you - I read your post last week, so was really hoping you had had some good news. Is there anyway you can change hospital/consultant at this point? I don't understand why they can not see, that even disregarding all the valid reasons you have for a elective, that psychologically you are not really in a state to give birth naturally anyway, and I thought that if a woman was that afraid that the powers that be would agree to an elective. And if your SPD gets any worse then you surely won't be able to get into a suitable position for birthing - a friend of mine wanted to give birth naturally and was absolutely refused because of her SPD. Do you know anyone who has had an elective at the hospital you are due to birth in?

Cornballer I'm realised surprised they aren't more concerned about your BP. With both my DCs my BP was very high in the last month of pregnancy and with DS they induced me and with DD they brought my ELCS forward.

been following this post too and was hoping to see a more happy outcome!
I agree with all the other ladies, you really need to see someone else. I would go to your GP and explain that you feel very out of control of this situation and your anxiety levels are creeping up, OR chat to your midwife and see if she can help.
My BP was similar to yours the other day at my 20 week scan and there was talk of admitting me there and then, fortunately after an hour trace it came back down, but most hospitals take high bp in pregnancy very seriously.
Its very hard to enter into a battle when you are feeling so vulnerable but I would definitely say stick to your guns and just keep explaining how you feel.
Ive worked on many many programmes about birth, special care and maternity units and I've never heard of such treatment, Ive seen women who have been granted an elcs purely out of fear of natural labour so I know that some hospitals do take maternal anxiety very very seriously.
Good luck and please keep us all posted!

Cornballer I have just read your postings. I'm very sad to read that you are so upset and not getting much support. Like my hospital, GP and midwife they seem to be so desperate for everyone to have a natural delivery. My baby was breach and they looked utterly shocked when they thought I might not elect to have an ECV (in the end I did and it worked out OK but I did feel the pressure to go for it). Is there someone that can accompany you to the GP? If so, take them in to your consultation. It helped when I took my partner in with me a couple of weeks ago. I got my membrane sweep yest (at 39 +6) cos we told them I had had enough (have SPD too)and was suffering from panic attacks. GP said she was concerned about me ending up with post natal depression. Let us know how you are keeping each day. It will help with the countdown to week 39 when they might need to give you a c section anyway (hopefully baby won't turn). Big hugs X

Hi Cornballer, I just wondered if your thread had had a happy outcome for you? xx

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