so sick of being happy

[addictedtothefirsttrimester]

i'm 7+4, i've had 2 previous mc before the 7 week mark.

i am fed up of being happy all the time, my mil (who doesnt think me and dh should be having kids atm) is constantly using this against me when she can hear i'm not happy she says well you have to deal with all the symptoms of pregnancy, you choose this. my mum and one of my close friends are more understanding but othre friends just keep saying, but you want children, you want to be pregnant, why are you so sad?

AAARRRRGGGGGHHHHH

i'm not upset about being pregnant, i wnat this baby, i really do. but i'm struggling to cope with ms and spending half my life on the toilet weeing (or so it seems) and eating non stop because i am just SO hungry all the time. i'm fed up of not being able to lift and carry and not being able to walk very far (i have a high mc risk so doc says i'm not allowed to do much)

i'm scared about loosing this baby, i'm scared about giving birth i'm scared about being a mummy.

add this together with my changing body shap which is also quite scary and hormonal changes going on inside me

no i'm not happy all the time, and i dont think i need to be.

anyone else dealing with this?

Youa re perfectly entitled to feel this way you have a lot going on at the moment. Maybe tell your MIL that it is not just the pg issues you are dealing with you have all the other stuff going on to and although you REALLY want this baby you are struggling. I was thoroughly fed up when I was having dd2 and moaned lots but it didnt mean I did not want her I just hate being PG. Hope you feel better soon and your MIL gets more understanding.

addictedtothefirsttrimester I feel for you. No you don't HAVE to be happy all the time just because you're pregnant. You're allowed to be scared and hormonal and feeling like you can't hope.

There were times in my first trimester (I'm now in my third - first baby) when it felt all too much as I was so ill. The worry of whether or not the pregnancy would last also played on my mind a lot and I have never had a mc - so I can't imagine how stressful it would be for you. I'm not a big mn'er but I'm sure that someone can recommend a thread for 'pregnant after mc' that could really support you in this.

All aspects of pregnancy can be really scary and you shouldn't feel bad that you are scared - it's a really natural feeling. Pregnancy and childbirth is a wonderful thing but as with everything in life, comes with it's ups and downs, don't let your MIL get to you over this.

of course you will not feel happy all the time. I think before I was pregnant I slightly wondered why pregnant people moaned when something so wonderful was happening. I remember occassionally being annoyed with my SIL for moaning, when I so badly wanted to be pregnant. But now I have been very ill with morning sickness and I realise that the symptoms can make you feel dreadful / miserable etc and this can be something you are struggling with all the time so it is hard to remain happy. DH found it very confusing at first that I was moaning, as this is a much wanted pregnancy (took 16months ttc), but eventually I think he realised that anyone feeling horrible is going to feel miserable to some extent, whatever the cause. So please don't feel bad about this at all. And I'm 10 weeks now and my symptoms are improving slowly, so hopefully you won't feel so bad for too much longer

I echo what everyone else says. I am 2nd trimester, first baby, and I am scared, anxious, excited, joyful but worried. I commented once to DH that it was okay for everyone ELSE to be so excited for us .. they weren't the ones doing it! It is a scary anxious time... and even more so if you are a high mc risk. At 7 weeks also you are still assimilating all your feelings. (I hate being told 'you must be so excited' and when I reply 'well I am rather anxious' just being looked at like I have grown a head.) Of course you are happy, you just have alot of stuff going on right now. Don't put pressure on yourself to be openly ecstatic as well!

And tell your MIL to go and boil her head.

Happy all the time is never normal PG or not!
I am 33+5 with number 5. I now remember that I HATED PG on all 4 previous occasions!!! But I REALLY wanted another baby all through the 8 year gap since my last DD was born! Like forgetting pain (or so they say...LOL) I completely forgot how utterly miserable I feel for the entire 2nd and 3rd trimester.There is really nothing I would recommend.I moan and whinge all day and am so self obsessed I bore myself stupid.DP can't understand it at all as I was so blasé about adding another child to our family....Still,I do know from all previous experience that -once the newborn angst and baby blues has settled -and even when it hasn't - having your child to love and getting on with being the kind of family you want to be,is a million times easier than pregnancy -( but you still wont feel happy all the time!)

thanks all, its just so fustrating actually writing it down here made me feel much better about it all