And the knicker-watch begins... pregnancy after mc

[stillfrazzled]

Found out y'day am pg, after miscarrying at 4+3 on New Year's Day.

Am over the moon, of course, but also of the frame of the mind that I'm pg for now, rather than actually having a baby.

And TBH, going to the loo is terrifying because I keep thinking I'm going to see blood.

Obviously I'm going to have to get over myself before I turn into a basket case, but any tips on how you do that?

Hi. Sorry to hear about your MC but congratulations on this new lo. I'm almost 33 weeks after a MMC at 12 weeks in March so totally understand how terrified you are.

Try to take each minute as it comes and make sure you get plenty of rest. I assume you are already taking your folic acid etc? I phoned my EPU at 7 weeks and had an early scan. I'm lucky that I could self-refer but contact your doctor/midwife and see what the situation is in your area.

IME the knicker-checking never goes but the time will pass.

Good luck.

Another one here, who is 31 weeks pg after MMC, so too understand how you feel, I have knicker-checked every time I have been to the toilet, even now!!

Take each day as it comes....and good luck, wishing you superglue style stickiness xx

forgot to say congratulations

Hi all, thanks for the kind words. I suspect I will be the same re checking until well after viability, assuming I make it that far...

Am already on folic acid, trying to eat well and exercise. Will go to dr tomorrow and see if I can refer to EPU for a scan in a few weeks (assuming I make it that far etc etc etc). Don't know if they will, tho - for the mc, they told me they didn't do 'reassurance scans' and the first one I'd get would be 12 weeks

Will pay for viability scan (assuming... etc etc etc) and go private if no joy.

Thanks, Elizabeth. I am trying the 'get through one day at a time' approach, but it's horrible.

I seem to have lost all my confidence in my body's ability to carry a baby - I ran about 50 yards for the train last night and then panicked, and DH and I far too nervous to have s*x because the mc started the morning after we DTD for the first time since finding out.

Dear stillfrazzled

Just had to post, because I had a mmc with my first pregnancy, and I was, just like you looking for blood all the time in my second.
You know with the logical side of your mind that the statistics are massively in your favour, but still you worry.

It is difficult to get through the first weeks. I think if you get more nasty symptoms than the first time, sickness etc that is reassuring (but not like me with a bout of Hyperemesis!).

I remember as the time of my mmc a doctor said to me that she thought that a woman's body sometimes needed 'a trial run - a kick start to the overies' which accounted for so many first pregnancies ending in miscarriage. Remembering that, and saying to myself that mine had had that, did help.

It is so much easier after the first tri!
You will get there!

LucindaE
XX

Ahh this is FAB news frazzled i am THRILLED for you

I know what you are talking about only too well.
I dont think that anything any one says will reassure you tbh, its a ritual that you must go through every time you go to the loo.
I even started to wear black underwear because i couldnt face seeing blood, of course there was nothing there and ds is nearly 7 now.

But trying for number 2, i have had a very very rough ride, i am an axious ball of distress every minute of every day from the moment i find out that i am pregnant.

An early scan may just put your mind at rest, is this possible?

Thanks to you both for the good wishes

I think I am definitely going to have an early scan - will beg for an appointment at the EPU (if nothing else, dates are a bit weird so hopefully they will want to make sure I don't miss a nuchal if I get that far). If they say no I will go private.

I do remember this from DS - had bleeds at 6 and 8 weeks, and although I'm not going to say it spoiled the pregnancy, I didn't actually start to think I Am Having a Baby until he was pretty much able to survive outside the womb.

Between bleeds with DS and the mc, am pretty much resigned that I will bleed at some point.

Sunburn, I actually considered going all black on the undies front myself; only reason I haven't is cos the wipe's then going to be even more traumatic.

No less of a basket case here I'm afraid, I'm almost 20 weeks and always checking still!

Congratulations and good luck - let's hope this is a little sticky bean for you

I meant to say, I didn't have ONE symptom with this PG. I don't remember my 12 week scan, I was in such a daze and couldn't believe there was a little healthy wriggly baby in there! So don't panic if you feel well - I'm still waiting for a symptom (other than an newly expanding waist line and love of Spearmint Polos!)

Hello - I am in a v similar situation, found out yesterday I am pregnant again after a mc at 12 weeks last September.

I made a post describing the positive test as the first of many, many hurdles - it's so shit how the whole excitement/happiness thing that so many can take for granted, is stolen from those of us who've lost a pregnancy.

One day at a time, and ask for an early scan. I've got a 2yo DS and when I was first PG with him I asked for an early scan - I got one because of two previous MCs.

Now I've had 3 MCs altogether, so am hoping to get a 'reassurance' referal to EPAU soon.

Fingers crossed for October

you're not a basket case it's totally normal. tbh i only stopped being frightened out of my mind at 12 week scan, and am still not taking anything for granted...once you've miscarried you just don't

be kind to yourself.

good luck

x

p.s. you could find yourself a walk in epu and just go at 6 or 7 weeks...

can I join in ?

I am nearly 5 weeks (I think!) after a MC at Xmas Got two DCs already and have had 4 MCs in total so I can't quite believe this is happening. Went to see the GP today and she has referred me for a scan at 7 weeks (if I make it that far).

Looks like there's quite a few of us! We could form Knicker-Checkers Anonymous and post reassuring each other that we are not quite as mad as we think we are...

Hope these are all 'sticky beans' as a PP said

I know you're right, Elizabeth - I have a fab friend with a fairly, er, unusual outlook on life who cheerfully sent me a link when I was 3 months pg pointing out that I had just as much chance of being killed in a car crash as losing my baby in one (obv she meant to reassure me that the bub was VERY well protected and hadn't actually thought of the other side of it. I did laugh at the utter madness of it).

So I know things logically. But I panic about them irrationally. It's very wearing, you know? Am having the little cramps I REMEMBER having in early stages of pregnancy with DS, but now I freeze and then rush to the loo to check.

Hi, I'm joining the knicker checker gang!!! i'm 6 weeks now after having 2 mc last year (11wks & 8wks), everytime a get a little bit of discharge (sorry gross!!) I run to the toilet panicking, but so far so good ! xxx

Joining this one too had a mmc in may 09 at nearly 10wks and now pg again only 5wks but i feel so scared this time round, even though i've had 2dd(6&4) i think going to the toilet to check will become a habit.

Also have to contend with daily injection of blood thining as have a blood clotting disorder. (long story)

Just updating after a weekend away... haven't found any blood yet, tho still checking obsessively.

Am having to really fight the urge to go and use my last CB digi, just to see if the weeks since conception bit has increased.

WWYD? DH says I'll then get caught in a cycle of twice-weekly pg tests and will worry even more...