I want another baby

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Yes well im craving nother baby, we have 2 girls, but dh says no!....i really want a little boy, I know i cant predict whats gunna popp out but, i reallly want another, should I obey dh, we have dicussed it many times and that is his final word,it is not fair, I really want another little one?..what am I to do?...both kids were unplaned, im quite young so I would prefer to get them popppd out sooner rather than later..he is 9 years older than me too, so things could get complicated if we leave it any longer,...but I want another baby!..what am I to do?

you are not actually asking women here to sanction you tricking your h into having another baby are you?

NO I AM NOT!, Tartinheels, but I had hoped for some words of wisdom that (from their own experience that helped them at a similar situation,) may help me get through this wanting of mine.

I'm afraid my only experience is a friend of mine who pressurised her husband in to having a third child, and he left her.

Partly, I think he felt my friend saw him as nothing more than a sperm donor. He also couldn't cope with 3 children.

I think you need to realise before you start discussions that you and your husband are on an equal footing. You have no more right to request another child than he has to refuse.

I can understand how frustrating it must be to want a baby but for your other half to not want a baby. Try making it clear to him how much you want another child (argument about wanting a boy doesn't really wash as you could easily end up with another girl). At the end of the day its something you need to agree on. Try looking at it from his point of view - how would you feel if it was you who didn't want another baby and he "disobeyed" you.

I can empathise with your frustration; I was "waiting" for about 2 years to have a baby, but DH didn't feel ready. In that situation it's always going to be the party who doesn't want a baby that gets their way (unless you "trick" them into getting you pregnant, which obviously would be a Very Bad Idea). It feels very unfair, but it really has to be a mutual decision.

I really wanted a third but at the time my DP was totally against- he kept giving all the negative practical reasons why it would be a bad idea. I could see what he meant- but I really didnt feel finished with having children so I calmly but quite regularly (!) told him how I felt- giving him loads of positives to think about. We are both from families of 3 children so I think this helped. After about a year of talking about it he realised how much it meant to me and so we decided (together) that we would try for number 3. It took a lot longer than we both thought it would and so when I did get PG we were both really happy and excited. DS2 is now 2 yrs old and it is now DP who says he wants another one! I am not so sure this time!

So- don't give up on the idea of number 3- but equally you have to give your DP time to think about it and hopefully he will then understand what it means to you and he will be able to imagine another baby- and how much he will love him or her!

I am not exactly sure what you are asking but if your DH is not keen then either you have to wait for him to change his mind or come to terms with having 2. If you forget to take a pill for example its your obligation to tell him so he can use additional precautions.

DO NOT use the "I want a boy line" because it could just as easily be a third girl - my mum said that and she didn't get her boy until the 5th time! (And then she spoiled him so rotten that even as an adult my sisters and I still resent that he was the favourite!) There is another family (their DD2 in my DD's class at school) I know who have 4 little girls before they had their son.

As others have said it has to be a mutual decision - you don't say how old you are but maybe he'll feel different in a couple of years time. I wasn't very keen initially on having DC3 but DH really wanted a third - although of course I had to agree to it (would have been hard for him to trick me though short of managing to remove coil while I was asleep without me noticing!) - we will have a 4 year gap as it took me some times to come to terms with it.

He knows I will not agree to a 4th DC although he'd really like another after this one. Is that fair on him? But it has to be mutual... he keeps on saying he hopes I'll make a contraceptive mistake!