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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Original poster

I cannot cope with not talking to people about it irl...

29 replies

burstingtotalkaboutit · 03/12/2009 17:26

so can i talk to you here!

found out today that am pregnant...longed for longed for second child, miscarriage earlier this year, no luck before or since then over 2 years of trying.

have one dc.

I am dizzy with it all, can't take it in, had just started down the testing/intervention route, but looks like we won't have to...

dh thinks we shouldn't tell anyone (we did last time when I miscarried). not sure I can hold out as all i want to do is talk about it.

i'm the most excruciatingly gorgeous mix of emotion. I'm numb, happy, scared out of my mind, peaceful and tingling with nerves and excitement all at once.

how on earth am i going to do another 8 weeks of this???

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belgo · 03/12/2009 17:32

Congratulations! I don't see why you shouldn't tell people if you really want to - it won't change the outcome of the pregnancy and it won't make a miscarriage feel any worse. In fact you may find people are very understanding.

But enough talk about miscarriages! The chances are very high that this pregnancy will be fine - many women including me have had miscarriages and have gone on to have healthy babies.

If I were you I would make an appointment with your doctor and discuss the possibility of an early scan - I had a scan at 8 weeks and I found that this did help reassure me and also made the 8 weeks worry manageable as it broke it up into two sets of four weeks.

Again congratulations!

Original poster
burstingtotalkaboutit · 03/12/2009 20:37

i know. it's dh that doesn't really want to and i respect that.

i doubt i'll last that long...i'll buckle under the strain i imagine.

6 tests and counting today all BFP...think i am actually preg!

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YouDontKnowMeFromAdam · 03/12/2009 20:44

Congratulations... what fantastic news.

nickytwotimes · 03/12/2009 20:48

Congratulations, bursting.

Everything crossed for a nice, healthy, happy pregnancy.

It'll fly by!

OrmIrian · 03/12/2009 20:51

Wow! Many congrats!

Original poster
burstingtotalkaboutit · 03/12/2009 20:51

you all know me.

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maxpower · 03/12/2009 20:53

congratulations!

nickytwotimes · 03/12/2009 21:05

Aha!

Well, look forward to finding out your 'true' identity when you are ready!

WHen will you be due? August?

Original poster
burstingtotalkaboutit · 03/12/2009 21:42

mid august

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belgo · 04/12/2009 07:56

I want to know who you are!

lucy101 · 04/12/2009 09:45

I told a few people at 5 weeks... no way I could have kept it secret - and in fact as my body changed quite dramatically and I was being so sick lots of people guessed!I did worry about miscarrying... but then something could go wrong at any time and at least I would have had some support or at least understanding if the worst did happen.

YanknCock · 04/12/2009 09:51

I am a blabbermouth. First pregnancy, I'd already told everyone and then miscarried at 7 weeks. Second pregnancy, still told everyone by 8 weeks. I am rubbish at keeping secrets, and figured if anything happened, I'd rather people knew why I was upset.

Congratulations to you, whoever you are!

Geocentric · 04/12/2009 09:53

Congratulations!!!!

tea7oranges · 04/12/2009 14:03

I feel exactly the same! It's my first time, and I'm really nervous but over the moon as well. This is my first post here. I did my first (ever) test on Monday and we worked out I am due on 30th July 2010. We haven't told anyone yet, and I'm not sure how long to wait before telling my parents/close friends. Maybe I'll tell them at Christmas so I can do it in person. I've even got a hen party to go on this weekend and am going to pretend I am on antibiotics to excuse me from drinking!

I thought I should join up here and then at least I can talk about it with someone. And I think I'll feel much better when I've got some sort of confirmation. When do you have a scan? At 12 weeks? That seems like years away!

One thing... what does BFP mean? Honestly, I know nothing. Still, very excited!

fiveisanawfullybignumber · 04/12/2009 14:27

Congratulations!
I'd much rather tell people, if anything (God forbid) did happen, I'd be able to at least talk to people and not feel so alone.
DH was a bit like that for some reason about this PG (no 5), think it's cos his sister kept her quiet till 12 weeks then did this massive family announcement. Personally I'd rather tell who i wanted and not be quite so pretentious about the whole thing.
Well done again, and ask your doc for an early scan to reassure you.

mrsseed · 04/12/2009 14:49

Similar position, found out on Monday I'm due, I have a 4 year old and 2 miscarriages this year - good news is at least it shows I can get pregnant.
My family doesnt know yet but my boss does and a close friend at work -work have to know because of what my job entails. Also incase the same happens again and I disappear rapidly. Having my friend knw really helps as she has been in similar position.
I can see where your husband is coming from though. We didnt tell my family about the 3rd pregnancy(2nd miscaariage) and as they live a way away they never knew (until I got drunk with my mum a couple of months ago - but then I could handle the emmotions and brush it away).

Its such a personal choice - with the first miscarriage the hardest part for me was dealing with all the phonecalls of sympathy, I just wanted to move on. With the second it hard carrying on as normal, but ultimately easier as I can now tell people when I am in control.

Basically its up to you, but I can strongly recomend telling one friend who you can gas to or as you are doing - use mumsnet!

sarah

tea7oranges · 04/12/2009 15:44

Thank you ladies. I think I will tell a couple of people soon, like you say it would be nice to have someone to talk to just in case something didn't work out. Thanks for being so honest, it's really helped just to know others are in exactly the same boat.

I guess I was hesitating about telling too many people because I didn't want the phonecalls of sympathy either. But just telling a couple of close friends who would be supportive would be great.

Good luck with everything too and I'll keep my fingers crossed for us both!

Alice

tea7oranges · 04/12/2009 15:46

I mean us all...

sunburntats · 04/12/2009 15:58

OOOh we have only told a few people at work, no one in the family yet.

Similar to you, 2 mcs, 3 years of trying. Due to start fertility treatement in Jan.

Not telling people because its such a fucking pain to have to then tell them that i am mcing.

so far though....so good.

tea7oranges · 04/12/2009 18:21

Woah. I've just had my first email from mumsnet, and according to them, I'm 6 weeks gone already! I didn't realise you counted from the first day of your last period. I guess I thought you counted from the conception date.

Looks like I have everything to learn...

winjy · 04/12/2009 18:52

bfp means big fat positive...

congrats!! when are u due then tea think u may have simialr dates to me as i am 6+1 i too mc this yr, in june was heartbreaking but hoping that it'll be ok this time...

my dp doesnt want me to tell anyone either but it really is killing me...he let me tell my nan coz im so close to her and my friend coz he didnt want my friend getting funny with me coz shes been trying to get pg since march and every month has text me her updates so i was ok to tell her. apart from that its just my boss that knows but really want to tell everyone else...its killing me, one of the girls in uni said to me the other day that i havent been myself recently and asked if everything was ok...so tempted to say then but didnt...so hard!!

hope all ok xx

Original poster
burstingtotalkaboutit · 05/12/2009 11:56

so today is the day my period is due. tests are just getting stronger and stronger. feels like i can finally believe it.

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winjy · 05/12/2009 12:14

ha me too...i did a clearblue digi (the 3rd one in 3 weeks one every week) and it has put me on further again at 3+ weeks...starting to get excited about having a baby now and thinking that this preg is more real. i know it'll be even more real when i have a scan but i am feeling so much more positive...

tea7oranges · 06/12/2009 20:46

Brilliant. Glad everything's going well for you. Thanks for deciphering BFP for me winjy! I'm due on the 30th July I think, but I'm going to make an appointment at the doctor tomorrow and see what they say.

I had a bit of a worry today, I had a little bit of brown blood. It seems that it's a bad sign for some people, and totally normal for others, so I guess we'll see what happens. I feel fine though, so hopefully everything's OK.

I still haven't told anyone yet, think I'll wait two weeks til Christmas and tell people in person. I wanted to tell the girls on the hen night this weekend, but it just feels a bit early. I guess it's different for everyone.

Hope everyone else is still doing fine.

Original poster
burstingtotalkaboutit · 09/12/2009 12:58

I'm finding this so hard. It feels so different to my last pregnancies (pre miscarriage). i'm numb. i don't feel pregnant. I don't talk to my bean. i'm waiting to miscarry, that's what it feels like.

i keep saying things to myself like 'at least i'll be able to drink over xmas when it happens'.

it's horrible.

i'll be 5 weeks on saturday (i.e. nothing) and it feels interminable.

just want to curl up in a ball and sleep it out.

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