Hi,
I am so sorry to hear about your daughter . I remember the rawness of the first months and I also remember feeling desperate to have the hope to be a mum again soon, but the fear of trying again as well.
My first son was stillborn just over 4 years ago at 24 weeks exactly due to severe preeclampsia and HELLP syndrome. He died 2 days previously because it wasn't caught in time . I think I started to get the signs from about 22 weeks but wasn't aware, and nobody seems to realise that you can get it that early (GPs etc). I had had high BP from about 14 weeks on.
I had a preconception meeting like yourself a few months later and was given a plan of care for a next pregnancy.
I didn't have a C-section but was advised to leave it 6 months to give my body chance to normalise. It then took another 6 months to conceive so I found out I was pregnant the week before his first birthday. I took asprin and the plan of care was followed carefully - with the consultant that had made the plan seeing me quite regularly. My BP remained stable around 130/80 the whole time - but then suddenly went up overnight at 29+5 and I had 2+ of protein so I was admitted for a few days and given steroids to mature tha baby's lungs. I was seen every 2 days for a few more days but then admitted again with the familiar chest pains from HELLP syndrome. Kept in a weekend and then discharged for one day to be seen in assessment daily. Only managed one day of this and then was back in hospital that evening. After blood tests they decided to do a C section there and then and DS was born at 31+3. He was obviously early but he cried very quickly after he was born and his 2nd Apgar was 9. He was in neonatal for 5 weeks but he was healthy and his stay was very uneventful. He's now a very bright, healthy and gorgeous 2 and 3/4 -yr-old.
In April this year, I had a very big surprise when I found out I was expecting again. We were understandably worried and scared at the prospect, expecting to (at the very best) have a premature baby. However my BP has again remained stable, but this time I am at 36+3 today and no signs of preeclampsia yet . Two weeks tomorrow I have a planned C Section and I am now really hoping to get through it and have my baby (a DD) without any signs of it.
Sorry that was long but I hope it helps you to have some hope. I think they are so much more careful with you in future pregnancies and I found everyone was very alert to the possibility that I could get preeclampsia again at any time.
I got a lot of support from the SANDS forum, but it is out of action at the moment. There are however hundreds of us on here. Please come and join is when you feel able. There's also a TTC/ next pregnancy /new baby section which has got me through.