Pregnant bumps and never been pregnant idiot females!

[SweetFudge]

Just been to the ante natal appointment hour at GP's and waited with all the other pregnant ladies. In walks this non pregnant woman for a nurse's appointment. She stops at the door of the waiting room and her eyes literally bulge as she slowly stares at all of us like we are some odd species she's just encountered.

Sits herself down and starts tapping on her laptop and in between long sighs over the work she is doing, she stares and stares at each of us and our bumps as we takes turns to have our weight and urine done. And then does a little shudder when the most pregnant lady (38 weeks) walks past her to GP's office. Maybe I should have take it more in my stride. Called her stupid cow as she stared at my bump when it was my turn to see GP.

I am fed up with idiot females like these. It doesn't happen often but it when it does, it makes a pregnant woman feel like a beached whale or the goodyear blimp. Never mind the hot weather making me feel much heavier than usual. Maybe I should have sat on her and flattened the tan out of her limbs.

doesn't matter what they are thinking, Olive Oil, I'm not in their head.

What is it about pregnancy that makes people think they have the right to stare and/or comment about your appearance/clothes for nine months?

I used to go to an evening class but I stopped going because every week the other women would say "wow! You've grown!" or "you're huge"

The week I responded "I should bloody hope so, I've got a baby in here", I realised I'd been a bit "short". Still, they pissed me off so much I stopped attending, so that's how much I hated it.

Thanks for your sympathies. I find stayng in the house keeps me cool, but I feel like a prisoner. Am planning highly passive birth, as those of you who've seen my passive birth thread might have noticed.........

Oh i do the shuddering too

Grrrrr Fio2

I don't think staring is as rude as calling someone a stupid cow! I'd be really upset for days if someone said that to me.

I always stare at pregnant ladies, I can't help it, yes sometimes I stare at them and think BLOODY HELL THEY ARE MASSIVE but I'm really thinking "How the hell is that massive thing going to get out of that teeny tiny hole?!"

Pregnancy is a funny time though - no-one (sane) would dream of making personal comments about your shape when not pregnant. Imagine if I went to work & a colleague said "bloody hell, nik, your arse looks huge today" or "goodness what small boobs you have" yet when I was pregnant they seemed to think it was perfectly acceptable to pass comment on my body!!! I'm sure I've probably done the same to pregnant friends too. Luckily no-one has said anything judgemental about my post partum figure or I'd have socked them one!

I loathed all the comments in pregnancy.

Succint observation, Nik72.

I can't help staring. it is a mixture of envy, sympathy and awe. I gaped at someone the other day, she was soo big! I look and can't believe I've done that three times. I also feel envious, cos I don't think I will ever feel a little baby poking me inside again. I symapthise wiht anyone hugely pg in this heat, I've always had mine before the heat of mid summer. I try not to pass comments tho, although with friends soemtimes I can't help myself. I would never do it to a stranger tho.

I hate getting bigger by the minute and I bet I stared in horrid fascination before I had children
Also I don't think newborn babies are that attractive tbh, I thought ds was Gorgeous but now he is a bit older I look back and he looks like a little Mayan monkey in his first photos. The first thing I said apparently (pethidine) was 'omg it's a Mekon' cos his head was all purple and pointed
Don't think this lady deserves a hard time. It IS hot tho ...

I can't wait to get my bump and grow ENORMOUS!!

I am overweight and have always been body-conscious so I think it will be so liberating to have a reason - the best reason - and to have a body that others admire (coz everyone secretly admires pregnant women's bods since they are doing such an amazing thing.

Maybe it will wear off but I'll let you know...

All the best to everyone who is due soon x

I have to say it was my body-consciousness that made it so uncomfortable for me. Yes, I was pregnant not fat - but when your belly is the size of a space-hopper it's hard, for me anyway, to feel anything but enormous and ungainly.

Nik72... heh I disagree. People have NO problem commenting when you're petite. I'm 8 stone (used to be 7.5 stone pre ds2) and 5ft 4. I have endured HUNDREDS of comments (some politer than others) on my size and it is a huge bugbear of mine. No I'm not &^&%$ing anorexic, && off and mind your own business. No I don't need feeding up, thank you very much. Complete strangers feel the need to comment on my dietry habits when they know NOTHING about me. People would react in horror if I said "hmm, think you need to go on a diet, dear?" Or "Oh you're so cute and chubby!"

Then again, I got six billion comments in pregnancy as well along the vein of how huge I was compared to how small I was before rolls eyes emoticon here

Before i had kids i always thought pregnant women were absolutley gorgeous and fascinating as i could never get over the fact that they had a baby in there!! im now on my third pregnancy and i found with my other two and now this one i suppose (im 27 weeks) that you can tell when people stare because they admire or are amazed or whatever but sometimes people just stare, and keep staring, they kinda make you feel like your carrying a nasty contagious bug or something - and that i think is rude!!! if people find a pregnant women lovely and are admiring you thats sweet and i dont mind at all, but i had an appointment at the midwife today and some old lady sat and stared at me like i was a rotten old vegetable or something! i dont care, i guess you have to learn to take people like that with a pinch of salt!

I think it's rude to stare no matter what you are thinking.

What if I stared at someone because I admired their hair - you know, really stared for a long time?

They have no idea why I'm staring or what I'm thinking.

I currently feel like a sodding blimp, having lost almost 4 stone before I was pregnant. So yes, body conciousness comes into it.

oh I loved my bump so much, didn't worry at all about how I looked!

Maybe she had had a child and was empathising with the big bumps

I have to really try not to stare, get this really amazed/jealous feeling when I see pregnant ladies. Don't understand the weird ones who stare but aren't envious!

When I was pg I loved people staring (no matter whether they were looking in disgust or whatever) despite literally looking like a beached whale (put on 4 stone and was carrying a ten pounder!)

My petite friend however hated it and was so uncomfortable with her bump yet she was so little and neat looking - she looked fantastic compared to me!

Same here, Mogwai. Staring which is repeated and prolonged is extremely rude in my book. I try not to stare and if I find someone endearing or sweet or interesting, I make a point of smiling to them and if I am lucky, we get to chat. I think that it has a lot to do with my background and culture where staring at someone for more than a few seconds is seen as rude and aggressive.

If I do find something endearing, I'll usually say so, so I will pay people a compliment.

I think you are extra-touchy when you have a body full of hormones! I bet if I looked like some sort of goddess, I'd enjoy people staring!

I went into a school recently and somebody who I'd never met said "wow, you look so lovely - so healthy". I took that as a compliment, and she wasn't staring! (hmmm maybe she meant FAT )

To be fair I've probably committed all manner of faux pas before I was ever pregnant. How I know better now!

Yessssssss, the hormones bit. Maybe that is why DH always comes home with all manner of goodies these days. It does keep me happy.

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I can't help but look because I am fascinated and envious (not planning to have any more of my own!) but I try to catch the woman's eye and smile or say something if she's noticed for fear of being thought rude!

I must admit I was a bit stary when I first had my antenatal clinic appt- the room was bursting with bumps! I remember saying to dh 'do you think I will ever be that big?'... lol, now I look like I have a huge beach ball in my dress!
I must say though that even with all the tiredness and sickness and all the rest of it, I have never felt quite so gorgeous and will probably miss it in a few weeks time!

She's just jealous. It never bothers me when someone tries to stare down my bump - I'm proud!

I have to say that occasionally when I see a bump I get a mental image of John Hurt in Alien and have to supress a shudder. I don't stare though (at least I don't think so). It only happens when I see those very firm, perfectly rounded bumps that are all at the front.

Actually, I do remember staring once, it was someone I knew well though. She had lots and lots of amniotic fluid and we were in a meeting at work and her stomach just rippled like a water-bed for the whole meeting.