Antenatal classes 2nd time around?

[Mishy1234]

Our 2nd baby is due next May and I've been considering the pros and cons of doing antenatal classes this time around. I did NHS ones last time, but you don't get them again with subsequent pregnancies.

I didn't do NCT ones last time and kind of regretted it, as I know several people from my NHS group who really enjoyed the social side of them and the meeting up afterwards.

Has anyone done NCT classes with a second pregnancy? I do think I would benefit from the content and also would be good for making contact with other Mums due around the same time. I am worried though that people might feel awkward having me in their class if they know I've 'been there and done that'. I'm not the type of person to go on about my experience or go on to Mums to be with information (unless they specifically ask), but just wanted to hear other opinions. How would you feel about it? I suppose I could always say to the teacher not to go out of her way to mention it?

For those who are pregnant with toddlers, how do you go around making contact with other expectant Mums or do you just do the toddler groups and stay within your existing network?

WWYD?

Our local NCT branch offer a 'refresher course' for parents having subsequent babies. They will cover whatever you want in that one meeting. hth

Check the NCT website - in our area they do 'Refresher' courses for second/third/fourth time Mums, which are a bit shorter but you get the social element and it's handy if you've had a bit of a break between babies. I know they don't do them everywhere though. I'm planning on doing it for our next one as the first one was 6 weeks early and we only managed to get to 2 antenatal classes before he'd arrived.

I wouldnt bother joining the NCT second time around. It will be full of first time mothers for whom everything is new and post birth they will sit in coffee shops/each others houses for hours breastfeeding and gazing at their new borns. You on the other hand will have a toddler to entertain who I guess will be thoroughly bored at such meet ups (and possibly not over welcomed by the other mothers of PFBs).

I moved away after having my first baby so had to leave my NCT friends behind. I nearly joined NCT in the new city but so glad I didnt. I met lots of like minded mothers with new borns and toddlers at the local toddler groups. I would try this first, perhaps go to ones you havent been to before? Also you can tap into the network of mums that went back to work after baby no. one so dont have a ready made circle of mum friends but are very keen to find others in the same boat.

Yes I think doing antenatal classes aimed at first time mums would be difficult if you want to meet up afterwards - we met up at first in Starbucks which most toddlers would find deathly dull and now in people's homes, but I think we would have all been secretly horrified at the idea of a huge toddler running around trampling on our PFBs (not that I think you'd let him trample but YKIM)

You could try an NCT refresher course - if it's more than a couple of sessions you're likely to bond a bit more with people, even if it is only a couple of sessions you could always ask the teacher to collect phone numbers/email addresses of those who want to be contacted at the last session, perhaps you could offer to host a get together at yours after the course, before or after the babies are due. (If you get the teacher to ask you avoid awkwardness - just ask her privately at the start of the course.)

Or the NCT do coffee mornings hosted in members' homes in some areas - perhaps you could find one of these to go to, or offer to host one? Also good to try is the local Children's Centre, they often have lots of groups to go to.

you don't need to join the NCT to attend their classes.
xx

Thanks for the feedback, you all kind of confirmed what I thought.

I've had a search and there is a refresher course in Feb which is a little early, but could be just the thing. Toddler groups also a very good idea.

I think there should be a totally separate course entitled 'how to manage with a newborn and toddler!', as I think it's an art all of its own.

You definitely DO need the support of other mums who know what it is to have a toddler. I think I would have been quite twitchy about having a toddler running around my pfb tbh.

That's that decided then!

Mishy1234, you're definitely not alone in thinking about this. I've been thinking about it, too, for social reasons (don't want a second child to just tag along with DS's social life), and also to ask more specific questions about birth and so on the next time.

... however, the latter could be a bit awkward, as I was a bit torn up the first time , and want to find out how to deal with that second time... but don't want to freak out the other expectant mothers. So thanks a million, ja9 and crumpetsolo, for the info about refresher courses. No doubt the social side would be easier with other mums who have more than one! Cheers!

Hi Mishy - I'm not bothering with classes 2nd time round either, but have gone back to ante-natal yoga, where there are some first timers and other second timers. Also gives me a bit of time to focus on this pregnancy and baby, and I get an evening out once a week! The Birthlight website should help you find something in your area, or ask your MW or local SureStart centre about local groups.

Hope it's all going well.