stupid comments from colleagues

[blackteaplease]

Why do people feel they can comment on the size of your bump?

I am 33+5 and have a large bump which is all out the front. I'm 5 foot 4 and pre-pregnancy was a size 8/10.

At least twice a day I am getting called fatty, huge, asking if I'm sure it's not twins, asking if I can get much bigger. It's really getting me down.

Does anybody have any advice/ witty comebacks for me before I explode in a hormone driven rage at the next person to say something?

Commenting on the size of anyone you dont know very well, pregnant or not, is indiscrete and frankly rude. I dont suppose anyone actually puts any thought into these comments when made to a pregnant woman though.

During my first pregnancy one of the receptionists at work informed me at 34ish weeks that I was so small the baby was going to be tiny, in her 'most expert' opinion. ds was 8lb5 - so not at all small. Her comment really upset me at the time.

Ashamed to say that I did comment on (larger) size of current bump of one of other local mums as she had not noticed that I was also pregnant again and only 2 weeks behind her. Hope she wasnt offended but I think it says more about my hangups about my own 'small' bumps than hers. Having read this thread I will definately not be making any further comments!

I hate this, I get the opposite, whenever I sit down at work with a grateful sigh of relief (I'm on my feet most of the day) some idiot will look at me condesendingly and say

"well there's nothing there".

I was a size 6/8 before pregnancy with a body fat index of 11.5% and a BMI of 18.5. I am now a size 10/12 maternity and have put on over 2 stone. Feels as if there is something there to me thank you very much. People are so frigging rude sometimes.

KittyTN, didn't you find that almost everyone you meet is an "expert" though? I did, and still do - and it still pisses me off now DS is nearly 2 when everyone else seems to think they know (and need to comment on) what is going on with DS - e.g. -"oh he must be tired/hungry/fed up/have a full nappy.

Do they think I haven't any clue at all?

BlackTea - I think with only 3 weeks to go you can afford to be a bit snarky about it and perhaps say something like:
"and the prize for observation goes to...";
or ostentatiously take out a small notebook and tick it, saying "number 5 today..."
or "are you always this rude to everyone or just the pregnant women?" (which will make them worried about sexist comments)

Sorry to hear that you are having this, it is a pita.

Poor you, I went through a stage of people's comments really bothering me, mostly earlier in pregnancy when I felt I wasn't "allowed" to look as pregnant as I did - devastating when you have been yearning for a bump for so long. I have found that the more my pg goes on the less I give a monkeys about all the comments, because I feel justified in looking big, I have a whole other human being in there and am growing it and carrying it round 24/7. I think a lot of people say it for some thing to say. My sister called me fatty quite a few times (with no malice at all) before me pointing out how difficult a changing body was without feeling scrutinised. I found saying, "do you think I look that big, someone else just told me I look really neat, it's so hard to know who to listen to, and it's not like i can influence it really is it?" just to make people think about what they're saying. Good luck!

I am sensitive about my size anyway, and have had a couple of comments along the line of 'gosh you're already huge', which I am not at all ashamed to say have instantly turned me into a raging pregzilla and I have totally lost my temper and been very explicit about my opinion of their appearance.

'At least mine's not permanent' - ha ha ha!

Great thread!

People always feel they have the right to say something but WHY!!!!!! with baby no3. i think i have heard it all and just smile and walk off!these people dont know me and what they say goes well over my head now!!

But whilst pregnant with the extra hormones and a baby dancing on your bladder, feet in your ribs, spd, back ache and braxton hicks!
and all the other wonderful things we have to deal with while being pregnant!
you do have the right to lose your cool!
wouldnt it be great to get a tshirt made with all the comments on so they know they cant say anything you aint heard already!

i have one saying " does my bump look big in this" love it!

Good luckand all the best!

It's really annoying, I can remember. But in fairness it really is strange seeing someone you know getting bigger with pregnancy. Whenever I've seen pregnant friends after not seeing them for a while, I'm sure I've made similar (though not rude, more, wow, look how big you are) comments.

Ha ha you can't win with me! I get offended when people comment on how huge my belly is already (I'm only 14 weeks ) but the other day a friend said that she couldn't even tell I was pg and I was upset about that too! I think people should keep quiet unless they want to comment about how neat and beautiful my bump is

Z x

I sometimes have to work with a bunch of gits unreconstructed wankers people who are not my normal colleagues and have given up on both witty comebacks and laughing-along.
I now say 'Actually, that came across as really quite rude. Was that how you meant it?'

nine times out of ten they blush and stutter and apologise and never do it again

Everyone knows that when you're pg, your hormones mean you're not rational and you can totally go insane, shout "fuck off" at anyone and get away with it. Trust me, I've been getting away with it for 37+ wks now .