How careful are you about observing pregnancy rules? i.e. food, lifestyle etc

[flyingcloud]

I know it's a case of weighing up the risks, but coming on MN scares me sometimes! Today I read that dying my hair and eating chinese food are bad. I just wondered what experienced mothers' individual takes on this were. My friends are split between the strictly observant ones (no caffeine, no chocolate and not a snifter of alcohol) and the ones who don't really bother to find out what to do and what not to do, so eat pâté, drink a glass when they feel like, dye their hair, fly as late as they can, etc, etc.

I have done the following while pregnant, mostly unwittingly: not knowing I'm pregnant or not knowing it wasn't allowed and I'm feeling increasingly guilty:
Drink coffee (one cup a day, can't do without)
Eat chocolate
Have eaten steak tartare before knowing I was pregnant
Drank like a fish for the first two weeks (when I didn't know I was pg)
Smoked for the first two weeks (ditto)
Eaten packaged service station sandwiches
Dyed my hair
Eaten chinese food, undoubtedly stuffed with msg

etc, etc

I am not immune to toxoplasmosis either.

You may think I'm stupid for asking all these questions, but would love some real motherhood experiences.

Thank you!

I follow the Food Standards Agency guidelines. Although I wouldn't eat mussels, as I've had food poisoning from mussels before.

I have about one glass of wine a fortnight. I know I could have more, but I don't.

I do have eggs with soft yolks. But I do make sure they're lion-branded, and therefore from vaccinated hens.

I've had a couple of pinkish steaks, but more by accident than design.

Although I was very careful to cut back on tea in the first 12 weeks (I don't drink coffee) - I'm now drinking it regularly again.

Quietones - yes, people tend to be more careful in the first 12 weeks with alcohol, until the placenta's up and running.

Right:
Pregnancy 1: sort of losely followed all the rules, did not worry too much, had MMC @ 9 weeks
Pregnancy 2: obsessively followed every advice in the book, took the most expensive vitamins, rested, ate only organic produce , etc, etc, had MMC @ 8 weeks
Pregnancy 3: thought, sod it, I'll just do as I please, did not avoid alcohol (although did not drink a lot), ate cheese, ate unwashed pre-washed salad IYKWIM, etc, etc, had MMC @ 8 weeks.
Pregnancy 4: decided I will just go with what I am comfortable with ie toast the bride at a wedding with champagne, eat heathily but not obsess about every bite that crosses my lips, had DS1
Pregnancy 5: as above, had premature DS2 at 31 weeks and he is well
Pregnancy 6: as above, MMC 9 weeks
Pregnancy 7: as above, DS3

In conclusion: much as it would be stupid to go out of your way to do things that are recognised to put the unborn baby's or your own health at risk, successfully having a baby is a LOTTERY IMO.
So I drank a tiny bit of alcohol about once a month, I had a couple of cups of tea/day, I continued to do my usual exercise. But: I took Folic acid, I did not smoke (well, easy, I do not smoke anyway ) etc.

Re Listeria, interestingly French woman are apparently not advised to avoid unpasteurised cheeses. Is this true? Any expats out there who have read this far and happen to know?
I HATE all the unnecessary anxiety generated by too much advice re do this, do NOT do that, eat this, do not eat that. The implication is if you do not follow the rules and something goes wrong IT IS YOUR FAULT. When it really isn't. And if you do lose a pregnancy the last thing anybody needs is guilt added to the grief.

So, there, I am done. Sorry for the rant. I did not even realise I felt quite so strongly about this...

As you were.

I don't drink alcohol.
I avoid all the "no" foods: undercooked/rare food, runny eggs, pate, liver, unpasteurised and soft cheeses like brie and camembert.
I wash salads and wear gloves for gardening
Didn't know about pre-packed sandwiches- will avoid from now on.
Don't dye hair
Don't take painkillers or any other medicine.
Don't drink coffee- couldn't stomach it anyway. But I have two cups of tea a day.

Blimey, looking at that list, it seems my life is really restricted at the moment.

But honestly? It's no sacrifice. And I promise I'm not being smug/sanctimonious- I just consider it an incredibly small price to pay. Barely noticeable, in fact.

I don't drink alcohol.
I avoid all the "no" foods: undercooked/rare food, runny eggs, pate, liver, unpasteurised and soft cheeses like brie and camembert.
I wash salads and wear gloves for gardening
Didn't know about pre-packed sandwiches- will avoid from now on.
Don't dye hair
Don't take painkillers or any other medicine.
Don't drink coffee- couldn't stomach it anyway. But I have two cups of tea a day.

Blimey, looking at that list, it seems my life is really restricted at the moment.

But honestly? It's no sacrifice. And I promise I'm not being smug/sanctimonious- I just consider it an incredibly small price to pay. Barely noticeable, in fact.

I get that people like to be careful and am sure that all the "rules" are quite well intentioned. But my baby has come from me and is part of who I am. If i'm good enough to deserve to be given the chance of sucessfully conceiving, carrying and birthing that baby then i'm good enough to continue being me.

Clearly I don't do crack or go on binge drinking missions but then I didn't anyway?! I'm not about to start worrying about cheese and steak.

Sometimes you can just know a bit too much, all the ladies in my family before me, my mother, my grand mother, hers before all did as they pleased. Miraculously I'm here

I'm generally a bit paranoid so there is loads of things I have avoided whilst pregnant, but it's no big deal not to have stuff.

1. I haven't really drunk much alcohol. Just a bit in the first few weeks before i knew I had concieved and then probably about 3 units for the rest of the pregnancy
2. I don't drink anything with caffine - just decafe tea and herbal teas
3. I'm vegetarian so there was no probs not having pate or shellfish 4)Haven't got a cat, but I do use gloves in the garden
4. Haven't had any mayonaise since pregnant and rather miss that and I do miss my stilton as well
5. I have had copius amounts of chocolates though

I generally followed the guidelines given by my midwife. I think a lot of forums can scare women into starving themselves

I'm vegi and not keen on soft / mouldy cheese
Eat pre-packed sandwiches and salads - wasn't even aware I shouldn't!
don't drink coffee (apart from the very odd cup, one every couple of months) as i went right off it this time and last time. Drink more wine this time (not in 1st 12 weeks) as last time I felt sick for months! don't eat peanuts as DH has asthma but probably not as careful about checking as i should be!
The hair dye thing is because the dye won't take, isn't it - same as perms? Not because of any harm?

Thank you everyone - I should advise that some of the things I mentioned I read on MN and I have no idea if their good or bad, such as pre-packaged sandwiches and chinese food (there was a thread yesterday which said the MSGs can be bad, but as I haven't read this in any guidelines I'm not going to stress about this one)

I had an American friend who didn't eat chocolate while pg and I think American guidelines say, if possible, to avoid all caffeine and chocolate has caffeine in it. American guidelines would be a little bit stricter I think.

But I am eating chocolate

And I highlighted my hair - thrilled with the results so not going to worry about that one either!

French guidelines (I live in France which is partly why I ask about conflicting advice) - well when I first went to the doctor she said no alcohol, cigarettes and painkillers, everything else was find in moderation. I did then do a bit of research and found the official French guidelines which are as follows

No cheese from unpasteurised milk
No smoked fish (I think the quality of smoked fish tends to be lower here than in England/Scotland/Ireland)
No charcuterie (deli products)
Caffeine in moderation
No alcohol, drugs, tobacco
They're quite hot on toxoplasmosis if you're not immune as most French women are and I think there is quite a high incidence of it anyway.

I'm following the 'be sensible but not obsessive' route - so have cut right back on alcohol but having the odd glass, don't smoke anyway, generally trying to eat as healthily as possible (lots of broccoli )

But... have had 'charcuterie' cold meat, the odd slice of soft cheese (did make DH trim all the rind off for me though!)

The Food Standards Agency list of 'avoids' is my approach - after all, it's their job to know this stuff - and has much less stuff on it than some of the pregnancy websites, which seem to set out to panic people.

It does differ in other countries though - my SIL is in Australia and was told to completely avoid sushi, whereas here it's OK if from reputable restaurant/take away (to do with the regulations on how they freeze the fish). Can't wait to tell her that I'm allowed it as she'll be spitting!

Hi,
I live in France, am 29 weeks, and to answer Pacificdogwood's question, no doctor has ever told me to avoid cheese (what would we eat otherwise?!) The only things I have to avoid are uncooked meat and unwashed veggies, as I'm toxo negative, but otherwise I get the impression they're not half as paranoid over here!
Enjoy your pregnancies everyone!

I don't drink alcohol anyway, but with dd I was obsessive, with ds I just had what I wanted. Made no difference except I didn't gain 4 stone with ds probably because I didn't feel deprived .

A pal who is a nutritionist was living out in Amsterdam. She researched American, Canadian, Dutch and UK rules, then went with the Dutch as they were the most lenient, and she thought the most pragmatic. Not too sure what the difference was, but I think the only thing she really gave up was pate.

Luckily I'm immune to toxoplasmosis, so I don't have to avoid cured meats which would have been a major change to my diet.

I do worry about listeria and salmonella though, but not excessively, and neither have caused major changes to my diet. I still eat a lot of cheese, just not blue cheese or brie /camembert, and have in fact found new cheeses in my quest to avoid monotony. I never eat packaged sandwiches/bought salads anyway, so no changes needed there.

I haven't drunk any alcohol, and again this hasn't really been a burden. If I fancy a beer, I have a non alcohol one. And if I fancy a glass of wine I have some juice.

Caffeine is probably my worst area. I have 1 cup of tea a day, plus unlimited chocolate and the occasional coffee or coke.

I ignore most of them. I know what the risks are. I think they are minimal. and I think I have as much chance of picking up something nasty like compilabacta (spelling ?) - serious food poisoning, from a tescos chicken sandwich. becasue thats what happened to my dh !!
I ate the occassional brie, pate and had a few glasses of wine along the way. Women on the continent do, so I couldn't see why I shouldn't. I cut down a bit, but did not eradicate them from my diet.

I didn´t worry too much about all this really, took a commonsense approach .. bearing in mind the potential effect of behaviour on the baby... So I would avoid smoke filled environments, but happily drink coffee or wine after a meal.. I tended towards treating my body a little better than normal to give the baby the bet start etc.

I don't worry about this either - only things I've cut out are pate, blue/unpasteurised cheese, rare steaks. I have about 1 unit of alcohol per week, haven't cut down my caffeine at all and am still having the odd cigarette

I'm hoping to use my common sense about all of this. Prawns from an "upmarket" supermarket yes, prawns from a wedding buffet? No.

I am paranoid about hair-dye and nail varnish. We have stricter rules on chemicals used in these within the EU, but research suggest that they can cause birth defects - particularly in the sex organs - at least with American products.

I think everything in moderation. this is my 1st pg & I was shocked at the do's and don'ts lists I was given! I am:
x avoiding coffee but drinking 2 teas a day (misleading info on caffeine, every specialist,midwife and gp has given me different advice on this & the booklets they gave me all said different amounts as well! decided on common sense)
x avoiding soft cheeses & pate (didn't like pate anyway)
x avoiding shark (seriously, thats on the list they gave me - I've never eaten it!)
x avoiding shellfish just in case (oh i miss praaaaawns)
x avoided alcohol 1st 3 months (well, apart fom a night out when i didn't know i was pg!! argh) & now have 1, I would say once a fortnight? approx. had half a weak lager last week, none this week, a glass of fizz at a wedding last month & a white wine sprizter that lasted me 2 hours at a meal that same week. 22 weeks tomorrow I think very moderate drinks ar fine, GP told me "1 or even 2 drinks drunk slowly wouldn't get past the placenta anyway"
x avoiding pre-packaged food (but always do)
x careful not to eat anything undercooked (eggs always semi-hard and meat not rare boo hoo)
x Avoided dying hair in 1st 3 months as was advised against it, after 3months is fine, I have nice snazzy new hair now (but have it done in a salon, they use foils if bleaching then it won't touch your scalp anyway)
x don't smoke & avoiding smoky environments - easy with the smoking ban
x i can't eat chocolate as diabete

I think you have to be relaxed as well, and enjoy the pregnancy, use common sense (i.e., who wants to be drunk whilst preggers anyway even if we were allowed?? it would feel totally weird and wrong), don't panic if you fancy some choccies or read up obsessively about what COULD possibly affect your bubba, chances are if you are relaxed you'll have a relaxed baby, if you're uptight you'll have an uptight one!

Lol, I think someone needs to ring China and tell them their pregnant women shouldn't be eating their food? Okay I get to be wary of MSG but that's such a ridiculous generalisation!

I've been more relaxed this time around (am 20+1)than 10 years ago when I had my son...

I've avoided soft cheese (brie is my fav...), alcohol, raw fish, runny eggs , and under cooked meats...

I have dyed my hair but checked the box and instructions first, have been drinking 1-2 coffee/tea a day plus the occasional diet coke and a snickers each day (peanuts included despite being asthmatic as I read that we have the highest rate of alergies despite not eating nuts in pregnancy and yet where nuts are eaten reguarly there is hardly any allergies! so figured I'd go with the flow...)

Not needed painkillers but if desperate I will take paracetamol...

I've also had pre packed sandwiches and am having a lovely prawn mayo one today...

I think the important thing like so many have said is moderation and to not stress yourself out which will do more harm than good!

Can you actually have a test to see if you immumne to toxoplasmosis??

MS and Migraines put paid to a lot of things, like beer (with DD I had a pint of bitter a few times a week ), coffee (still can't face it at 33 weeks) and blue cheese.

I miss pate dreadfully, but that's one I belive.

Have been eating prawns and peanut butter.

louloubelle you can have tests yer - blood tests. If you have had it you will still carry it but your body will have learned to fight it or something. i had it last year - before i was preg fortunately.

I wish someone would decide once and for all if it's just unpasteurised cheese (almost none is over here) or blue or mouldy. I really crave salty blue cheeses at the moment.

I too have been eating runny eggs but they are from a friend's hens and therefore extremely fersh and delicious.

No booze - but don't fancy it so that's the main reason
The odd cup of tea
no pate

that's it for me really. Have had loads of deli meats - why are they bad?

I'm less careful this time round than I was last time. Toxoplasmosis is my big worry as I had a blood test with DD (panicked after eating a small slice of salami at a wedding buffet) and found I'm not immune. I'm avoiding raw/ rare meat but eating cooked ham if I'm sure it is roasted rather than cured, washing salads, fruit and veg carefully and avoiding blue cheese/ soft cheese and pate.

However, I do have 3 cups (max) of proper tea per day but no other caffeine and 1-2 units of alcohol once a week. Last time I gave it up completely but have found I missed it much more this time round.

The deli meats can be a problem because if cured rather than cooked, they don't get up to a high enough temperature to kill off toxoplasmosis which is quite often found in pork and beef.

I badly need parma ham.
Am I going to go to pregnant lady hell for eating it?

There's no good reason to avoid shellfish (from reputable sources etc).

Re runny eggs - isn't salmonella from eggs very rare in the UK now? I hope so, anyway, since I really fancy a runny egg or two...

I eat chinese food, medium steak (always make mince/burgers well done, though), deli meats generally.

I have cut out pate (for now, I don't see how vitamin A can cause birth defects you're on the home stretch), caffeine, alcohol. Am not dying my hair but that is coincidental as was a fake blonde in my previous pregnancy!

How do you know if you are immune to toxoplasmosis? Will I have been tested?